Love the job change

Or at least my foot does and it was great having a weekend off to do things and attend church again. Larry has my little Honda Passport running and so I rode it around some, still have to get the plates on it but pal Carl didn't sign it where he needed to, talked to him by phone last night, he's glad the bike is running and will be in town Wed and come by and sign the title for me, he's on 2 week vacation so I can't catch him in plant today before work.
Saturday we did breakfast out with Larry's pals, then I came home to get some things done while he did yard sales with his daughter, she's hunting baby things for the baby due early this fall.
Later we went to Clayville for a festival held there, came back through Jim Edgar Panther Creek state park and looked at the camping area, picked up information and marked our little map with where there was some shade. The campground is new enough that the trees planted have not yet grown enough to provide much shade.
Larry's 30' 5th wheel does have central air but it's nice to know which sites would suit us best, and we liked it that the camp sites are so widely spaced, more feeling of privacy than some camp grounds, despite how short the trees are.
Church was great and many were glad I was able to come again. We have a cook-out after services next Sunday and I will bring fresh veggies and dip.
Busy getting bids on the work here for new roof with dormer and knee walls installed, and on central air. Have some places to call still, know a roofing company is coming Wed. I have hopes of seeing the first bid show up soon for roof/dormer and knee walls, it will be mailed.
The first for central air is about the same as what I paid to have central heat, new furnace and new heat ducting put in that old house in MO I bought when Sam and I divorced, but that was 1994 and costs have gone up.
I will have to put some photos here of the new little bike and also the work on the house as it's done. With over 80mpg I will really use the bike around town and to work all I can, and also still ride my old 10-speed bike, it's good for my heart and lungs and legs.

Beat tired, long shifts this week

I'm putting in a 7 day work week this week due to the job change and overtime the past 2 nights so IRS will like next week's check, and I will too. But my old body is not impressed, it's tired, it hurts and the gnat bites hurt and itch and I did put stuff on to try and avoid that nasty bug stuff...
but Kid and I did get some work done outside, still a lot of weeds and grass in the garden but have a good start on it now, got to keep working out there despite the bugs thinking I am a free meal.
Talking with contractors now for the new roof and dormer, need several quotes/bids and then make a decision and get on a work schedule to have that done. It will be great to no longer have a leaking roof, and know I am well started on the attic studio space.
Larry is still playing around with my Passport, it's not running yet but he is chasing down wiring problems and correcting as he goes.
I'm still getting a lot of trash spam coming from M.F.'s mail address, not impressed and wish they would stop showing up...easy to delete but it's still annoying.
The job change puts me non-union and so my earned vacation time was paid out/cashed out so I have great paycheck coming and wrote the check for what I still owe on the little bike and hope to see the title signed over and in my hand Friday.
Think the meds for the bug bites and ouch are kicking in..falling asleep so it's time to go get into bed instead of falling asleep here...

rain and more rain

Kid is doing better, most of the garden is planted and up, have a lot of weeding that needs done but too wet and cool to be outside.
Start work in frock/equipment tomorrow, better pay and hopefully less misery for my foot and ankle.
will be heading to Larry's place soon, he's not sure what to fix for supper either.
It's been a long haul, the past 7.5 months of work but I managed to do my job and carry my own weight and do work the others left un-done.
right now I'm feeling a bit moody, nothing wrong really, same stuff, too much debt, roof that leaks worse with every hard storm than it did the storm before, foot and ankle that hurts most of the time...
Know my life is pretty good, getting things worked out, bills go down a bit every month, the garden is planted, something I could not really do last year, i got stuff divided and re-planted that I wanted to do last spring and could not do by myself and had no help to do the job.
The job change is not permanent at this time but could be, and 2nd shift all week so that will make a change for Larry and I, we will have to figure a way to have quality time together during the week, harder with the schedule but he is looking forward to weekends together instead of the thursday/friday stuff I have had.
I've got an old Honda Passport I still owe $ on that we will be working on, hopefully I will soon also have my motorcycle permit before we have it running and it paid off really soon so I have the title and get it licensed.
Will have the settlement done soon, will be glad to have those medical bills off my back and no longer worry about them.
Glad I have gotten the mouches out of my life, including my #2 son. He's here in town but knows I don't have any money to help him out. He needs a job and to earn his own living, I have to, others have to, he can too...

Idiot Dog

Kid will not stay in the yard, even with me outside and calling him back, over and over. He did not understand that those vehicles were Dangerous..until this morning. He and I were walking the yard, early, and he had to be Stupid and run across Wall Street to go sniff at the corner where the people across the street set out their trash.
Trash day was yesterday and they do not use a trash can, just the plastic bags on the ground and plenty of them..so plenty to sniff.. I am calling that fool dog back and he waits until there are a car and a truck coming to decide to dart across the street..The pickup hit him, and he took off running,not home to Mommy but wildly through the back and up the alley.
It took over an hour before I found him and got him home, he has some scrapes and I hope he has learned something about those moving vehicles..I need a fence or electric pet fence here, I need a dog to get smarter, get a little less wild and crazy and figure out staying on our property is NOT the most stupid thing he could be doing..
So, now I have had my early morning stress, I can't afford to take the dog to a vet so he and his scrapes will have to heal up on their own. Most are small but 1 on the right lower shoulder area is rather big. He's going to hurt for a while but he usually learns fast, I do not have to put the trash up,he does not mess with my knitting, or shoes or chew up books, even if they are on the floor. I am hoping his little brain will think about this and figure out something about streets and cars and stay out of the street now.
Think I will go play with a pattern and some fabric, the dolls are so much better behaved than my much loved but not very smart dog...

Sun is out and I'm hurting,

man, that stinks, we finally start seeing nice, be outside and work in the garden and with my flower beds and both my hands and my right foot/ankle hate me.
With 3 people on vacation in a department of 11 there is no way I have a day off until sometime next week.
Kid is restless and wants out to play and run, which means I spend my time getting him back into our property most of the time we are outside together and that gets frustrating.
But I did get the temp opening in the frock/equipment room and start that job 5/16 and it has a better pay scale. That should help the finances here but I will have to be careful and practical and pay off debt as fast as I can.
Larry is doing well, he is walking more and doing small things on the camper, yard clean up and of course, running around town and enjoying having more energy. The new pacemaker really seems a lot bigger than the last one but some is swelling that will go down over time.
I am looking at auto web sites and dreaming a new with warranty and loads of safety features auto and today I looked at local realty listings. I don't want to move, I do like my little place, but at times I look at all the work needing done and get discouraged, especially when I think about living here through the renovations.
I should see a settlement from the accident by the end of this month. It will be good to get that behind me and have 1 less weight on my shoulders.
My blood pressure is staying down to acceptable numbers and I am checking it 2x per day,ok, so I do forget or not bother when I get home from work some nights but I am watching it. I did salt and vinegar chips for supper last night but I am still doing without caffeine and surviving that.
The Kish club doll has not arrived so I need to call them today and did get the phone # written down, now need to see if I can find my club membership card.
But the teas I ordered are here in town and out for delivery according to the tracking.
Paycheck is very short with only 3 days on it, but I will pull from savings and know next week I will see a lot of overtime and I am not sorry I took 2 days off to be with Larry for his surgery. And not taking it as paid vacation days means I have more vacation days to enjoy.
Someone is turning Kid loose when I am at work on weekends, so a locking run is top of the list and I will check the bank balance and see if I can swing the stuff today.
Time to get a shower and into clothes for the day, then can probably call Kish in Denver and check on the doll that should have gotten here..or so I think...

Happy May day

Not a bad work day but the family reunion Larry was to attend didn't go well, his oldest sister had chest pains and they took her to Rushville and now will be taking her on to the hospital in Peoria, she's from up in that area. I decided to stay home and not add to the confusion. Plus I will be working 12 days straight and know long hours in a vehicle and at a hospital and back home will be hard on me, without me, Larry will probably ride with his sister Pauline and her husband.
I will pray for all of them, safe roads and that Gladys is soon stable and home. Know it will be a long trip for Larry and is hard for me to not go running up there but know I need to be resting if I am to make it through the long work shifts and not be miserable with pain.
My blood pressure is running crazy, it's spiking very high so I am not checking it at least 2x a day and have really reduced my intake of tea and coffee. I will watch it for a while and if it continues to spike high or starts doing it again, I will know what it's been doing and take the little record to the doctor.. I do know stress is some of the problem, and work stress is something I can't do a lot to resolve but at least Larry's surgery is done and he's improving every day.
I will have to deal with State Farm and get that issue off my worry list, and the few other small things I fret about.
I'm coping with cutting down on caffeine but did notice a bit of headache in the mornings, not sure it's from no caffeine but know I don't run on the stuff so my body will adjust fast and I have some herbal teas coming, was easier to order on line than to run to Rushville and a better price.
I'm still waiting on the doll from Kish collector's club, had hoped she would be here by now but did e-mail them and ask, a doll shop has them for sale already so I know they are being shipped.
Well, it's movies and knitting this evening instead of supper with Larry and I will be sleeping here alone so I better clean off my bed, I've been trying to sew some so cleared my sewing area. Maybe I will even make some time to sew or at least cut out the outfit I want to work on.

A long and wet month.

But the garden is in, or most of it is in and up, most of the pampas grass roots I pulled from my established plants have started growing, only 1 along the south berm has not started growing and it will be easy to replace.
The hosta I divided seems to be doing well, so the north side of my lot is slowly improving and I have been working to find and remove all the tree seedlings that need pulled before they get so big I have to dig them out.
Larry's pacemaker surgery went well and early so that was good for him and those of us sitting and waiting. They put a cot in his room for me so I was handy through the night if/when he needed something. And the process of getting him released went faster than we expected, we were in the truck and heading home before 11:30 am.
I took loads of snacks, lots of knitting, my Kindle, my smallest Ipod, my latest hardback, tea bags and 1 of my traveling cups so I was stocked for the long wait and the stay overnight.
It's stayed cool and a lot of rain, but only 1 frost since I planted the garden. Things are not growing much but at least they are growing, I still need to buy and plant the more tender plants like tomatoes and squash, cucumbers but will be buying the plants soon.
I am waiting for my doll from the Kish club, I joined this year once I have my tax return. The dolls were expected in Feb. but didn't arrive in Denver until mid month April, and have been shipped out but mine has not gotten here and I don't have a tracking number or know if it's been shipped or with who.
I still don't have a settlement with State Farm but think they do have all the medical bills now and I will write them and ask for a date/appointment so we can get this moving on. It will be good to get it behind me and also know all the medical providers are paid.
Larry's daughter and son were there with me, at least until he was well settled in his room, it's the first time I have spent any time with them, I don't know them well and we all have such busy lives, they visit him on their way home from work here in town, and when I'm not around.
They don't object to him having a life, but this dating/girlfriend is very big change for adult kids to adjust to, they got along well with his wife, didn't want him alone and lonely after she passed away but he's not been a single and dating man since they were kids.
I have 2 days off coming up, and then will be working 12-13 days in a row while Anthony is on vacation and working alone most of those shifts. Know my foot will be hurting and miserable but will tough it out, Anthony worked for me Monday so I could be with Larry and worked alone yesterday so I could have that off too.
I am still watching bids posted and looking to bid to something that my foot will tolerate better but not holding my breath.

leaking roof

and plenty of rain to water all my garden and landscaping. Move the bed away from the leaking ceiling and go back to sleep for a while. Count my blessing that I do have a home, a job, Larry, and most of my life is pretty good.
This year I can not only walk my small place but I can also do my own mowing, chase my own weeds and dig up and divide some of my plants. Between the pampas grass and the hosta plants that I divided and spread out, I would have spent around $100 or more to buy the same amount of plants.
Work is hard and challenging, for my foot and because of the co-workers and what they do or don't do..man, I hate dealing with spoilt brat kids or cleaning up after spoilt brat kids and that's how it feels far too often.
I will watch for job openings, read the posted bid sheets and stay tough.
Larry is such a joy and blessing, he's so stable and strong, and solid. He's going to do just fine with this up coming surgery and we are going to have wonderful days, terrific nights and grow our relationship.
My finances are scary tight now, I get so angry about what I spent going out west, and while there, yes, resent the deception and lies, do feel I was used and deliberately used. But I know that part of my financial problems are some bad spending habits, the accident, and my own being stupid.
So, where I can't change the past, I am working hard to get things in good order, change some attitudes I have about money, keep a tighter rein on my money, and get the blasted plastic debt paid off and close most of the accounts. I don't need to ever be in this position again.
So, now to get with the stuff I need to do in the attic, get with stuff I need/want to do before work and go to work once again. I do have a really good life, I did make a very stupid choice in trust over a year ago, ouch, pay the bills for that, and move on. It sure could have been far worse...

The landscaper is working again!!!

Ok, so I am my own landscaper, but I am getting stuff done that I wanted to do last year and was not able to do. I now have pampas grass starts along the entire outer side of the south berm and am watering them now. I have even got some new starts along the north fence where I lost plants, will need a few more to fill in the rest of the gaps but at least I am making progress there too.
The hosta plants are getting divided and re-set so they will be more spread out, cover more area along the northwest side of my property, too much shade for the pampas grass in that area.I got my garden sprinkler cleaned so now it works like I need it to and I ran water in the soaking hose that lives along the east property line, it waters the day lilies and pampas grass along that alley.
I keep pulling tree seedlings everywhere I find them, and will be working on the weeds in the flower beds next.
Kid is not good help and won't stay on our property so ends up on his run and miserable before I am done outside for the day. He will learn but it's going to take time and a really tall fence or electric pet fence.
And I am running some auto comparison stuff for that vehicle I can't afford but would like to replace my old truck with..maybe, maybe...
I am so glad I am able to do more outside this year. My foot will always have problems and I know over time some will get worse but at least I am able to pull the weeds, have a garden, walk my small place and enjoy seeing what progress I have made in the years I have owned this place.
I still have a long way to go but I am seeing progress once again..

The doll club meeting

I had a really good time at our doll club meeting Sunday, took a vacation day so I could attend and do the program for the meeting. It was on artist dolls and I took some of my dolls that had not been out of their boxes for 7+ years. I also was hostess so did vegie and meat/cheese trays that were a great hit and Larry and I will share the leftovers, he needs to eat more vegies and it sure makes easy packing for my work meals.

Oh, rats, the stuff I don't have and need

There is a shipping position open in plant and I have no resume to submit. I have not had one for years, and now, to apply I need to put 1 together...asap...and not even sure where to start.
I am supposed to do something at the doll club meeting this Sunday and don't have that stuff ready either, but it won't take too long for me to chase the information and make up the hand out sheets I will then have printed out at some office supply place on the way to the meeting..cheaper than using my printer ink..so I can get that together but a resume???
I don't have a clue as to where I need to start- - -don't have enough education, LOL, at least not what would help, computer classes, office management type stuff, all my education on that line was when Ben was in diapers and he's 25 now. I don't know when I started as supply clerk, but can go back through some of my own info here and get that, and then there is the 8.5 months I lost with the accident...
But I have until Monday to apply, and I can either get my act together and put together a resume to submit with the on line app or I can not try for the job...and I do want to try. It's 2nd shift and salary but it's something to consider and would get me off my feet, still in the same plant, still doing something I would enjoy and find challenging and worth doing.
Guess I better get my act together as I also need to get the mower started and mow the grass here too before it decides to rain.

Into April and warmer weather..

Did get some stuff done outside, too windy today after work, good work shift but foot is finding it harder and harder to tolerate the job demands.
Larry is cooking tonight, I need to head over there soon, want to pack a change of clothes, need to turn the dryer back on, stuff in there is not yet dry.
Need to start working on the stuff for my doll club meeting this coming Sunday, on doll artists and their dolls..and where some are now, what they are doing...will get busy with that this week and get my dolls out and ready to go with me. Have the Sunday off as a paid vacation day...
Need to make a list and might do that this evening while Larry and I watch tv. I now have a light on 'my' side of the bed so I can see to knit or read while we relax and I have my feet up...nice improvement, foot appreciates me being down with foot elevated, my restless hands are happy and Larry has me there with him, everyone but my dog and his cat seem to win, LOL.
Decided to corrupt Jake's girlfriend, put a link to Tonner Dolls on her facebook page, she's into Twilight and he has that license....nothing like trying to gain another doll collector, now to see if she wants to learn to knit, and if she sews....
Yes, I am plotting...

cold and car shopping

It's cold, I'm cold and didn't sleep well, foot/ankle hurting issues there. The sun is out and I've been car shopping on line. I don't know if I will be buying but I am comparing and making lists and looking at warranty and mpg. I told Larry that color would be an issue too, I don't want to buy a black or really dark colored vehicle, we do want standard trans and air.
And I made a call about the medical bill from Clinical Radiologists that came Saturday. I have most of those accounts paid off now but this one, it's stupid how slow some of this has processed and I do know it's not been my Blue Cross that has been the delay.
But it looks like the medical bills from the accident are all in order,and I should soon see the paperwork from Blue Cross so that can be turned in and we can get with finishing up the settlement from this accident. It's been over a year now, and will soon be 6 months since I returned to work.
I'm sleeping badly from pain issues, Larry is concerned some but knows I have been trying to bid to something easier for my foot and I am taking some tylonal now and then. He doesn't mind that it disturbs his sleep once in a while, but he knows I want to be able to stay at Cargill as long as possible and I want to be able to work in the garden and flower beds, go for walks with him, camping and bike rides as soon as we have his bikes running and that I want to be able to take Kid walking, and ride my 10 speed this summer.
Think I will take a nap today before work, it sounds so lazy but I spend most of Saturday and Sunday at work on my feet and moving so end up beat tired lately, today will be a long and busy day but my Tuesdays and Wednesdays are usually easier for me.
I know I have a very good life, a great man in my life and things are so much better for me today than they were a year ago. I have walked a long and hard road to get to this point and place and have worked hard for the healing progress and for the stability I have gained.

Getting old, you know it's going to storm when. ..

The plate and screws in my right leg start to hurt, or the heel bone and nerves in that same foot really get uncomfortable and stay that way. Or Larry's left knee hurts and won't let up...made a restless night for both of us. An Kid had a huge ham bone, which had to be salty, he consumed a huge amount of water, had to go out to take care of that several times...I'm going to work beat tired and Larry went home to take his meds, try Icy-Hot on his aching knee and to get some rest.
The kindle will keep me company for my McDonald's breakfast today and I will hope when I get home from work Larry is hurting less.
Rain is predicted so I will also move the bed away from the wall and where the bedroom ceiling leaks and hope it doesn't rain much.
I need to call State Farm and do a bit of bugging about the settlement, want all the medical bills off my back and budget and would like to see the settlement done, funds to start replacing the leaking roof and do a few other things.
I did some of the stuff yesterday that I normally do on Sunday so my 'need to do' list should be shorter today, do have the floors to clean and a few other things but hope to have a quiet day and not be running hard on my feet much. And I picked up a can of coffee so do have my coffee club dues and can get them paid.
Daffies are sure getting ready to open, I don't think Larry is really going to pick them so he can give me free flowers...but I did tell him I had them counted...and I did tell him that I love him, and will fuss and worry about it, it just comes with the 'girlfriend' job. He'd already figured that out, LOL, and we're comfortable with US.

E-mails for Meds we don't need.

Today's mail had an e-mail from a guy I used to be involved with...and I think his e-mail has been hacked. If not, then he's sending me links for meds that Larry and I don't need, for problems we don't have. It's ok for others to use Viagra or Cialis or such but here it's not needed or wanted.
I'm not bragging or complaining but Larry and I have great communication, Good chemistry and a very honest and close relationship. We are both tactile and verbal people, like a lot of the same things for activities, same foods, and 'get the joke'.
It's a very new relationship, we know we are building for long term, and with a solid foundation and understandings.
Someone once told me that someday I might just meet my soul mate and I assured him that would not ever be happening, Larry thought his wife and he had a very good and solid marriage and nothing would ever come close, companionship was what he was looking for.
And now we are both figuring out this passionate, close, bonding thing we have between us, nothing either of us expected or were prepared to deal with.
We bring out something in each other, it's there, others can see it, feel it, hear it, it's more than a sexual thing, but that's sure right there, we'd NEVER be able to convince anyone that we are 'just friends' or platonic...
But when it comes to 'sexual enhancement aids' we really don't need them or want them...and e-mail links to them are not wanted...even when it's from hacked mail accounts.
Yes, I know Larry has a pacemaker, I was with him, and watched all the high tech stuff that was used yesterday for the annual device check up. And I go with him for the bi-weekly blood work that he has done every 2 weeks. And I will be there with him if he's in the hospital- -but I am not letting him go hold my hand the end of this month for my dental cleaning...I will probably walk down, it's just a few blocks and then show him my shining teeth once I have survived it.
I don't ill wish anyone, but do have some resentment about the funds I spent with trips out west, poor investment, not a cheap learning experience but I enjoyed the trips so will write off the costs and be so very glad I did the math and figured out the financial issues, found the foreclosure notice on line and learned I had been lied to about some huge financial obligations before they became my problems too.
My debt load is big enough without taking on that of someone else, but it's going down a bit at a time and Larry is very financially stable, able to pay his own way, puts into savings, everything he has is paid for and taken care of.
He also takes good care of his health, and that really matters to me, I am not a total health nut but do believe in personal responsibility and that includes for ones own body.
Now I need to get with payday errands, auto insurance, quick old house project and then get the pansy plants into the ground. Larry and I picked them up yesterday while we were in Springfield for his check up.

Another Monday

And it's cold and overcast, I thought we were to get warmer and sun, and I know Thursday and Friday to expect RAIN, ya, again on my days off. Larry and I are running to Springfield, it will be a good day, regardless of the weather.
The Kindle came last week and it now has a knitted cover, screen savers are on the was and a waterproof cover too..so I can soak in the tub and enjoy e-books. And I really like it, have been taking it to work and reading on my meal breaks, know I will enjoy this device a lot, but still will be reading paper books. I won't spend a lot buying e-books when there are so many available free..
The missing jeep keys turned up yesterday. I parked in front of the house and found them in the street, along the curb. They are the right keys, the jeep moved a few feet further into the yard and Andy's blankets are now in the back seat and NOT in my house, in my way.
I won't go into all that could have happened, the house keys on that ring are NOT to my doors, the jeep didn't get stolen and the keys are now safely here in the house. Not very responsible of the son that had them, am sure dropping them was an accident that will not happen again. He won't have the keys again.
Made it to a doll club meeting yesterday, did some needle felting, but think I am making some sort of dog, not a cute white sheep. But it was nice to be able to go and I didn't loose much work time.
And I came home right after, got the dog fed, and a change of clothes so I could go to Larry's house.
He waited supper on me, we had steaks and vegies, the broiler set off the smoke alarm which would not shut up, we put it outside for a while. The meal was good, the movie was ok and we were asleep early, and woke up way too early.
He's not happy with the colder weather, he's been working on getting the camper ready to go play, wants to go as soon as we can, not far,just an out of town escape, he talked this morning about sitting out, drinking coffee and watching it get light. I am going to remember to raid my blankets so we can wrap up in blankets and not freeze while we do that sit out side and watching it get light stuff.
I know it's not every one's idea of camping but it will work for us, we don't have to go far, just a bit of escape from the routine and town.
And we are doing coffee at home more often, mornings we wake up together, unless it's the weekend, then I'm heading to work and it's McDonalds and I eat breakfast and head to the plant.
The plant is ok, did bid for a job change, hourly management and my dept.head has that department and will be making the decision so I do have a chance. It's look at our records, interviews and so forth before a decision is made, it's not by seniority and I do think I have a fair chance of getting the job.
Life is going ok, get unhappy with my foot and then have to remind myself just how far that foot has come beyond what was expected and how much more I am doing, how much less pain I am having.
Still don't have the settlement done with State Farm and I need to make a call and nudge a bit on that one. Would like it done, those medical bills paid and off my back and know if I have enough left to put on that much needed new roof here.

Quiet house, too quiet..

Friday's storm did something to the phone lines and I have had NO dial tone since then but still have internet. Am waiting for AT&T to deal with the problem which is their problem and NOT in my house..checked the little box outside with a phone I know works...
My new Kindle is out for delivery so I am impatient to get it here and be able to use and enjoy it, and learn how to use it.
It's about 32 outside today with winds that give us a wind chill of 27. Larry wants to start doing work with the camper and in his garage but it's too cold, he has a heater he can take out there but I don't see any reason for him to go get chilled and be miserable. That stuff will wait and maybe I can help him with some of it.
I'm going to toss a dvd in and watch the last of Eureka season 3, knit on the Kindle sock I started yesterday and relax, not much to do here but wash dishes, sweep the floor, fold a basket of clean clothes...and get ready for work...
Ben has not shown up, his stuff is together and waiting for him, Kid is being quiet, the birds are content.
I know I will have a busy shift but doubt if I get the 200 chain put away, it's too heavy for me to lift, wish I had gotten it received Saturday so maybe it would have been put away by Anthony or Dave...oh, well, we will manage.

The lust has died...not buying iPad2

Here I have waited and drooled and waited for iPad2 to be out or at least have that official Apple news conference and now it's come and gone and there's not enough improvement/change for me to want 1 any more.
Which is great for the budget here, and once the state taxes are in my checking account I will be on line at Amazon.com to order that Kindle instead. And to set up a dedicated file, get another flash drive to dedicate to books so I can start working on that e-library I will enjoy.
And it's cool and gray today, had coffee early (for me) with Larry and now have a load of laundry going, bread dough raising and will be making some cinnamon rolls today. And maybe get the camping dishes washed up so they can go over to the camper.
I'm a bit restless today, need to sit and work on the knitting projects, need to get some things ready for tomorrow's trip to Springfield and Darrell's surgery. He's to have all his pre-op stuff done so that I don't end up making this trip and the surgery postponed. I let him know that I would be screaming mad if the surgery was not done and my valuable time taken up.
So, babysit the laundry and the baking and play with my knitting and Kid and quality time with Larry.
As for the iPad, I have a good net book, a good laptop, Jake's laptop, desk computer and will have an e-reader. I wanted a sd card slot and more ram at the same price, LOL, I don't consider 2 cameras to be a huge plus as I would not use them or would rarely use them...great way to save my $$$$ but I still think Apple puts out some great tech tools and toys.

Sad Day

I came home with foot hurting and sad. 1 of our maint.supervisors has passed away suddenly. He took 2 months off to go play in Florida, planning to return in April, work a bit longer and then retire. His last conversation with me had to do with him going where it was warm and sunny and me having to stay and deal with the cold and snow and issue out parts.
Now I want to go curl up in Larry's bed and feel his arms around me and just be sad. But he's sleeping and I will be sad, drag the tea and popcorn to my bed and watch something on dvd for a while and think about Bob Brown, who will be missed in our plant and town.
And I am going to treasure and cherish every minute I have with the people who are close to my heart, be glad they are a part of my life.
And I am going to thank God for the techie box in Larry's chest that helps keep his heart working, for the meds that help keep him alive and healthy and for the the fact that he has become, that we have become a part of each others life.
We talked about his wife today, I know I would have liked her, he still loves her and I hope he always does. They had 23 years together and each day was a treasure for them. He knows she did not want him to spend his remaining time alone and grieving for her, but I know a part of his heart is hers and will stay that way.
I hope she is somewhere that she can look in on how he's doing, I hope she is ok with me becoming his gal pal, his lover.
I hope that Mrs. Brown has great treasures in her heart from the years she and Bob were together, that she has comfort in her time of loss, just no way for me to explain how hard this had hit me, to walk into work and hear the news.
We don't control that time we are walking on this earth, it's not really ours. We can be careful, we can eat right, live a good life and still, it's not always something we have much control or choice about.
Larry did not die with his heart attack, Bob Brown did, I didn't die in that car accident, Mark Young did.
I'm not ready to put into words spoken out loud my feelings for Larry, but the feelings are there, they are in my actions and on my face. And right now I want to curl up in his arms and grieve for the loss of a respected supervisor and for his wife's pain and loss.

Monday again..

The past 2 weeks were loud, busy, occasionally insane but great. Ben is somewhere about but not here at the house, Jake is up in Chicago with his new girlfriend and will fly out from there, and the house is quiet and I am gaining on the cleaning.
Larry and I did supper out and then went by the skating party for his grandson. I didn't skate but both my feet thought they might be able to. Larry loved seeing me so 'grinnney' watching the kids skate.
It rained in the night, enough for me to need to move the bed and hear the roof leak. It won't always be that way, I cope now and Larry does understand how much better off this 'land bound' woman is with her own bit of land and leaking roof, old house than if I was in some rented apartment.
It will take a while to get things here back in order, I need to make more space in the storage area under the house for some more of Jake's stuff and will not gain on that for a few days. My next Friday off I am committed to being the driver for a friend having surgery so the day will start early with Larry and then I will be off to pick up Darrell and to Springfield and his surgery.
So, maybe it's a good thing that Larry starts his days around 4 am all the time.. We will do early breakfast at McD's and then I will be off to Virginia, take Darrell and his car, my netbook, knitting and book to Koke Mill Medical center.
We are talking camping and Larry thinks it's warm enough to start doing the stuff with the camper to get it ready, the drains, put water in the tank and run it through to check for leaks and I will help with some, wipe down the fridge inside and we have to start with stocking the kitchen with dedicated stuff, so we will go through my camping stuff first as I know I have some of what we will want.
We aren't going far, just getting out of town, away from my heavy street traffic, his place, just away from the routine and the tv and friends. We won't do a lot, walk, talk, enjoy quality time, but it will make a nice change of scenery for us. And the pals will imagine we are having a wild time, LOL, his son calls in the late afternoon and hopes he's not interrupting anything, Larry was sitting at the kitchen table and I was dealing with the laundry here. His daughter askes if he's getting enough rest and hopes his heart is doing ok.
Really, people, get a grip, We do Not spend All our time together Tearing each others clothes off.
Not that it's not a fun idea but real life seems to get in the way, as does the dog, my job, food and sleep needs....but we smile and laugh a lot, we like that holding hands stuff and ya, that was his hand on my bum while we stood rinkside and watched the kids skate last night, and neither of us were worried about who noticed (the lighting was dim, we were at the end of the protective wall there).
I'm not going to the Celtic Women concert, we watched the dvds I own, we talked and he would go if I did the driving once we got close to Peoria, and I woke up wanting to replace the bathroom sink here more. I can buy the dvd and cd and enjoy them over and over, the dvd won't let me pull the music for my ipod so it takes both here. And I can start looking at white pedistal style bathroom sinks that would suit me.
It's funny, for several months going to that concert was so high on my list and now I am really wanting the $$ for that bathroom sink replacement. It feels good to know I make those choices for my reasons and someone supports me, listens to my reasons and lets me bounce ideas around.
He watched my recovery from this accident and saw something he wanted to know better. Now he's seeing all the bits and pieces that were not showing there at McD's and other places here about town. I saw a quiet and good mannered man who did not look at me with pity or with disgust over my awkwardness and physical challenges. Who didn't talk to me often or gawk at me like I was some side show from the circus.
Now we are learning so much more, we are both very tactile people, and we talk, we ask and we listen. We both like quiet lives and hold some people very close to our hearts but don't need loads of friends or out with people all the time.
We both try and eat sensible and listen to our medical professionals so we are able to take better care of our bodies and have better quality of life.
We don't want big vacations, huge homes or to go on a cruse and for both of us, this town is Home, we like it here and don't want to move elsewhere. He takes care of what he owns, he manages his finances carefully and practically and he's at peace with the man he's grown into.
So, here I sit, knowing despite the leaking roof, the stuff that is taking up a lot of floor space in my tiny sewing space, the mess in the living room, I really have a very good life that just keeps getting better. And when I'm ready to try that skating, Larry will be there to support me, cheer me on if I can skate, even if it's slow and awkward and hug me close, no matter what.