cold and car shopping

It's cold, I'm cold and didn't sleep well, foot/ankle hurting issues there. The sun is out and I've been car shopping on line. I don't know if I will be buying but I am comparing and making lists and looking at warranty and mpg. I told Larry that color would be an issue too, I don't want to buy a black or really dark colored vehicle, we do want standard trans and air.
And I made a call about the medical bill from Clinical Radiologists that came Saturday. I have most of those accounts paid off now but this one, it's stupid how slow some of this has processed and I do know it's not been my Blue Cross that has been the delay.
But it looks like the medical bills from the accident are all in order,and I should soon see the paperwork from Blue Cross so that can be turned in and we can get with finishing up the settlement from this accident. It's been over a year now, and will soon be 6 months since I returned to work.
I'm sleeping badly from pain issues, Larry is concerned some but knows I have been trying to bid to something easier for my foot and I am taking some tylonal now and then. He doesn't mind that it disturbs his sleep once in a while, but he knows I want to be able to stay at Cargill as long as possible and I want to be able to work in the garden and flower beds, go for walks with him, camping and bike rides as soon as we have his bikes running and that I want to be able to take Kid walking, and ride my 10 speed this summer.
Think I will take a nap today before work, it sounds so lazy but I spend most of Saturday and Sunday at work on my feet and moving so end up beat tired lately, today will be a long and busy day but my Tuesdays and Wednesdays are usually easier for me.
I know I have a very good life, a great man in my life and things are so much better for me today than they were a year ago. I have walked a long and hard road to get to this point and place and have worked hard for the healing progress and for the stability I have gained.

Getting old, you know it's going to storm when. ..

The plate and screws in my right leg start to hurt, or the heel bone and nerves in that same foot really get uncomfortable and stay that way. Or Larry's left knee hurts and won't let up...made a restless night for both of us. An Kid had a huge ham bone, which had to be salty, he consumed a huge amount of water, had to go out to take care of that several times...I'm going to work beat tired and Larry went home to take his meds, try Icy-Hot on his aching knee and to get some rest.
The kindle will keep me company for my McDonald's breakfast today and I will hope when I get home from work Larry is hurting less.
Rain is predicted so I will also move the bed away from the wall and where the bedroom ceiling leaks and hope it doesn't rain much.
I need to call State Farm and do a bit of bugging about the settlement, want all the medical bills off my back and budget and would like to see the settlement done, funds to start replacing the leaking roof and do a few other things.
I did some of the stuff yesterday that I normally do on Sunday so my 'need to do' list should be shorter today, do have the floors to clean and a few other things but hope to have a quiet day and not be running hard on my feet much. And I picked up a can of coffee so do have my coffee club dues and can get them paid.
Daffies are sure getting ready to open, I don't think Larry is really going to pick them so he can give me free flowers...but I did tell him I had them counted...and I did tell him that I love him, and will fuss and worry about it, it just comes with the 'girlfriend' job. He'd already figured that out, LOL, and we're comfortable with US.

E-mails for Meds we don't need.

Today's mail had an e-mail from a guy I used to be involved with...and I think his e-mail has been hacked. If not, then he's sending me links for meds that Larry and I don't need, for problems we don't have. It's ok for others to use Viagra or Cialis or such but here it's not needed or wanted.
I'm not bragging or complaining but Larry and I have great communication, Good chemistry and a very honest and close relationship. We are both tactile and verbal people, like a lot of the same things for activities, same foods, and 'get the joke'.
It's a very new relationship, we know we are building for long term, and with a solid foundation and understandings.
Someone once told me that someday I might just meet my soul mate and I assured him that would not ever be happening, Larry thought his wife and he had a very good and solid marriage and nothing would ever come close, companionship was what he was looking for.
And now we are both figuring out this passionate, close, bonding thing we have between us, nothing either of us expected or were prepared to deal with.
We bring out something in each other, it's there, others can see it, feel it, hear it, it's more than a sexual thing, but that's sure right there, we'd NEVER be able to convince anyone that we are 'just friends' or platonic...
But when it comes to 'sexual enhancement aids' we really don't need them or want them...and e-mail links to them are not wanted...even when it's from hacked mail accounts.
Yes, I know Larry has a pacemaker, I was with him, and watched all the high tech stuff that was used yesterday for the annual device check up. And I go with him for the bi-weekly blood work that he has done every 2 weeks. And I will be there with him if he's in the hospital- -but I am not letting him go hold my hand the end of this month for my dental cleaning...I will probably walk down, it's just a few blocks and then show him my shining teeth once I have survived it.
I don't ill wish anyone, but do have some resentment about the funds I spent with trips out west, poor investment, not a cheap learning experience but I enjoyed the trips so will write off the costs and be so very glad I did the math and figured out the financial issues, found the foreclosure notice on line and learned I had been lied to about some huge financial obligations before they became my problems too.
My debt load is big enough without taking on that of someone else, but it's going down a bit at a time and Larry is very financially stable, able to pay his own way, puts into savings, everything he has is paid for and taken care of.
He also takes good care of his health, and that really matters to me, I am not a total health nut but do believe in personal responsibility and that includes for ones own body.
Now I need to get with payday errands, auto insurance, quick old house project and then get the pansy plants into the ground. Larry and I picked them up yesterday while we were in Springfield for his check up.

Another Monday

And it's cold and overcast, I thought we were to get warmer and sun, and I know Thursday and Friday to expect RAIN, ya, again on my days off. Larry and I are running to Springfield, it will be a good day, regardless of the weather.
The Kindle came last week and it now has a knitted cover, screen savers are on the was and a waterproof cover too..so I can soak in the tub and enjoy e-books. And I really like it, have been taking it to work and reading on my meal breaks, know I will enjoy this device a lot, but still will be reading paper books. I won't spend a lot buying e-books when there are so many available free..
The missing jeep keys turned up yesterday. I parked in front of the house and found them in the street, along the curb. They are the right keys, the jeep moved a few feet further into the yard and Andy's blankets are now in the back seat and NOT in my house, in my way.
I won't go into all that could have happened, the house keys on that ring are NOT to my doors, the jeep didn't get stolen and the keys are now safely here in the house. Not very responsible of the son that had them, am sure dropping them was an accident that will not happen again. He won't have the keys again.
Made it to a doll club meeting yesterday, did some needle felting, but think I am making some sort of dog, not a cute white sheep. But it was nice to be able to go and I didn't loose much work time.
And I came home right after, got the dog fed, and a change of clothes so I could go to Larry's house.
He waited supper on me, we had steaks and vegies, the broiler set off the smoke alarm which would not shut up, we put it outside for a while. The meal was good, the movie was ok and we were asleep early, and woke up way too early.
He's not happy with the colder weather, he's been working on getting the camper ready to go play, wants to go as soon as we can, not far,just an out of town escape, he talked this morning about sitting out, drinking coffee and watching it get light. I am going to remember to raid my blankets so we can wrap up in blankets and not freeze while we do that sit out side and watching it get light stuff.
I know it's not every one's idea of camping but it will work for us, we don't have to go far, just a bit of escape from the routine and town.
And we are doing coffee at home more often, mornings we wake up together, unless it's the weekend, then I'm heading to work and it's McDonalds and I eat breakfast and head to the plant.
The plant is ok, did bid for a job change, hourly management and my dept.head has that department and will be making the decision so I do have a chance. It's look at our records, interviews and so forth before a decision is made, it's not by seniority and I do think I have a fair chance of getting the job.
Life is going ok, get unhappy with my foot and then have to remind myself just how far that foot has come beyond what was expected and how much more I am doing, how much less pain I am having.
Still don't have the settlement done with State Farm and I need to make a call and nudge a bit on that one. Would like it done, those medical bills paid and off my back and know if I have enough left to put on that much needed new roof here.

Quiet house, too quiet..

Friday's storm did something to the phone lines and I have had NO dial tone since then but still have internet. Am waiting for AT&T to deal with the problem which is their problem and NOT in my house..checked the little box outside with a phone I know works...
My new Kindle is out for delivery so I am impatient to get it here and be able to use and enjoy it, and learn how to use it.
It's about 32 outside today with winds that give us a wind chill of 27. Larry wants to start doing work with the camper and in his garage but it's too cold, he has a heater he can take out there but I don't see any reason for him to go get chilled and be miserable. That stuff will wait and maybe I can help him with some of it.
I'm going to toss a dvd in and watch the last of Eureka season 3, knit on the Kindle sock I started yesterday and relax, not much to do here but wash dishes, sweep the floor, fold a basket of clean clothes...and get ready for work...
Ben has not shown up, his stuff is together and waiting for him, Kid is being quiet, the birds are content.
I know I will have a busy shift but doubt if I get the 200 chain put away, it's too heavy for me to lift, wish I had gotten it received Saturday so maybe it would have been put away by Anthony or Dave...oh, well, we will manage.

The lust has died...not buying iPad2

Here I have waited and drooled and waited for iPad2 to be out or at least have that official Apple news conference and now it's come and gone and there's not enough improvement/change for me to want 1 any more.
Which is great for the budget here, and once the state taxes are in my checking account I will be on line at Amazon.com to order that Kindle instead. And to set up a dedicated file, get another flash drive to dedicate to books so I can start working on that e-library I will enjoy.
And it's cool and gray today, had coffee early (for me) with Larry and now have a load of laundry going, bread dough raising and will be making some cinnamon rolls today. And maybe get the camping dishes washed up so they can go over to the camper.
I'm a bit restless today, need to sit and work on the knitting projects, need to get some things ready for tomorrow's trip to Springfield and Darrell's surgery. He's to have all his pre-op stuff done so that I don't end up making this trip and the surgery postponed. I let him know that I would be screaming mad if the surgery was not done and my valuable time taken up.
So, babysit the laundry and the baking and play with my knitting and Kid and quality time with Larry.
As for the iPad, I have a good net book, a good laptop, Jake's laptop, desk computer and will have an e-reader. I wanted a sd card slot and more ram at the same price, LOL, I don't consider 2 cameras to be a huge plus as I would not use them or would rarely use them...great way to save my $$$$ but I still think Apple puts out some great tech tools and toys.

Sad Day

I came home with foot hurting and sad. 1 of our maint.supervisors has passed away suddenly. He took 2 months off to go play in Florida, planning to return in April, work a bit longer and then retire. His last conversation with me had to do with him going where it was warm and sunny and me having to stay and deal with the cold and snow and issue out parts.
Now I want to go curl up in Larry's bed and feel his arms around me and just be sad. But he's sleeping and I will be sad, drag the tea and popcorn to my bed and watch something on dvd for a while and think about Bob Brown, who will be missed in our plant and town.
And I am going to treasure and cherish every minute I have with the people who are close to my heart, be glad they are a part of my life.
And I am going to thank God for the techie box in Larry's chest that helps keep his heart working, for the meds that help keep him alive and healthy and for the the fact that he has become, that we have become a part of each others life.
We talked about his wife today, I know I would have liked her, he still loves her and I hope he always does. They had 23 years together and each day was a treasure for them. He knows she did not want him to spend his remaining time alone and grieving for her, but I know a part of his heart is hers and will stay that way.
I hope she is somewhere that she can look in on how he's doing, I hope she is ok with me becoming his gal pal, his lover.
I hope that Mrs. Brown has great treasures in her heart from the years she and Bob were together, that she has comfort in her time of loss, just no way for me to explain how hard this had hit me, to walk into work and hear the news.
We don't control that time we are walking on this earth, it's not really ours. We can be careful, we can eat right, live a good life and still, it's not always something we have much control or choice about.
Larry did not die with his heart attack, Bob Brown did, I didn't die in that car accident, Mark Young did.
I'm not ready to put into words spoken out loud my feelings for Larry, but the feelings are there, they are in my actions and on my face. And right now I want to curl up in his arms and grieve for the loss of a respected supervisor and for his wife's pain and loss.