1 more work shift and then off for 3 days, some errands to run, some baking to do and a lot of quiet down time for me. My body needs the down time but the hours go faster often when I am working and there's no time for me to brood or be sad.
I miss Ben being around but am glad it's just the brids, Kid and me. I struggle to take care of me and my dog, my parrots, there's no way I need or want to take care of anyone else or deal with their problems.
And that hurting so much and not pushing myself hard here at home is part of that being very glad I am not involved with anyone who puts demands on me of any kind. Between the physical pain and the emotional hurting I am still having there's just not much quality 'Maggie' to share with anyone.
The trust stuff is at the lowest point I have probably ever been but I am quite fine with that for now, no one is pushing me to trust them either, at this time. It's almost 1 am and I need to be in bed and asleep, we have a storm coming in and I hope most of the world stays away and just lets me have peace and quiet. I don't enjoy all the commercial push and media brain washinig this time of year.