Life and living it

I am working on trying to put my life and my house into better order. That damn accident has made so many things harder for me to do or keep up with, and I have used it as an excuse to let thing go, like the mountains of clean laundry that grow and grow before I finally put it away. The shoes live close to the bed, another untidy mess I am now starting to deal with. But I need to have part of them handy so I decide which pairs live just under the bed and where the others go and then put them away. And I need to work on finances, will sell part of the vacation days I still have, won't use 8 days between middle April and the end of May so selling them soon will help put the finances into better order. I should not have gotten the new iPad but sure like it and am using it a lot. So, sell some vacation time, pay down the bill for the new toy and keep a tight budget until I have some bills paid off. I'm finally almost done with re-caning the Lincoln rocker I picked up last fall. I let it sit for months but finally decided I wanted it done and usable and would not wait until it was warm enough to work outside. It is a wet job and many long hours. I will have over 30 hours into re-weaving the cane seat and back once I am finished but it really looks good and is worth far more than the $35 I paid for it.

It's really Spring here

and this year I won't have a garden but I will put more time and work into the landscaping and dog dug holes among other things.  I started clean up outside today, will work on it Saturday and hope to burn some rubbish if the wind will allow, it's been too windy to burn lately.
It's also time to get the little bike ready for the road and start working on the blue one to see if we can resolve it's issue and have it running also.
Kid is enjoying the time outside with me but he's not staying in the yard, he's not helping me clean up and he is chasing all the feral cats that neighbors keep feeding.
Work is ok, changes in what needs done, how it's done but I am working out a schedule that gets my job duties done and doesn't drive me up the wall.
My big fun this past week has to be Apple and the new release, LOL, have watched Apple for years,own a few Ipods and love to see their ads, their gadgets and what edges they are pushing, and the new Ipad2 that was so hot this time last year, 'its so 2011' and the original Ipad, it's so history, lol.
Apple keeps changing how we do so many things, and what gadgets we think we need.  And I still rarely use that pre-paid Net 10 cell phone, expect people to call the land line, leave a call back number If they want me to call them back...and own a Kindle, a Toshiba laptop, a Toshiba tablet, a Dell desktop computer and will have a new Ipad, back engraved with my name coming when it's shipped, the case for it is already on the way...like I need a new tech toy.
My boys bought gaming systems, 1 was not enough, and I admit to buying them some of those things too.  I buy dolls, yarns, fabric on occasion and tech stuff.  But I still don't need a smart phone, still don't own a mixer, still knit my own socks and do most of my own old house work.
the budget did not need my adding the payments for that Ipad, but as the back will read, My tech toy and my bills to pay.  
and now I need to go earn some of that $$$ I need to use paying all those bills I have

March already?? I hadn't got my list for January done

And now it's March, the ground is wet, the moles are running tunnels like crazy through my little bit of turf, the dog is digging like crazy when and where he can, the place looks like a land mine field.
But I still have a dry roof and a great attic space that needs a huge amount of work and $ but is my hideaway and my sewing space.
We have a local 'bug' going about, stomach/entire digestive tract kind that cleans you out and dehydrates you if a person is not careful.  I shared it with that man I date, who is recovering slower than I am but he wasn't as sick with it, he just doesn't bounce back well.
Foot and I are getting along most of the time, on a 'we tolerate each other' level.  I don't think I will do much garden this year, some is the work, some is wanting more free time for other things and some is that so much doesn't get harvested well.  I seem to have bug battles and hate to use so much insecticide as know with our sand it's soon into the water going down river.
Living alone still works well for me, it's not that I don't think about how life could have been different but I am able to accept what I cannot change and move on with my life.
Jake's enjoying most of this deployment, he's been in Japan, he's been in Thailand, he's met so many people, seen so much, learned so much, grown so much, but still wants mom to knit him socks and bake him bread and cookies when she can.
People are one of those things in life that you can't change, they are and will be who they are, they might try to be different for a while but it doesn't last, or they might build a false image of who they want you to think they are but it does fall apart sometime. 
So, I pick up the pieces of my life and work on building my life, and now and then I look back at that past, or I stumble over an old memory, a dream tucked away and wonder why he wasn't honest about stuff that would come out in time, why when I did find out, he didn't see I was asking him to be honest and give us something we could fix and make work. 
Now, I don't make space in my life for anyone who could build a life with me, there is no place for long term, make a team stuff, there's this workable 2 single people who share time together, as we can and will make the time.  Not a future together thing, but a today thing and for Larry and I, that is what works, we care about each other but we have our own homes, our own lives and patterns and we work that well.
And I have my old house, my dolls and my creative arts, my few friends and my dig and silly loud parrots and I have peace.  Not problems other people have drug into my life, not financial disasters that I have to help dig out from. 
And not the dreams I once had, and some days I miss that having dreams stuff.