Time for new photos

There is a mountain of clean laundry on my bed to be taken care of, knitting to work on, kitchen floor needs mopped and instead I am adding photos to my blog.  The laundry and floor can wait a bit. 
Larry and I have gone camping 2 times so far, the first was raining off and on, a quiet trip to 'shake down' our camping, check for any problems with the camper, and make lists of what all we wish we had brought or would want on future camping trips, like a potato peeler and fix the leak at hot water tank. 
The knitting always goes, first trip I was working on some wild socks for Jake, the second trip I don't remember which socks went but I also started knitting a market bag from some crochet thread I bought boxes of at a yard sale.
Cargill work has some issues, the overtime and who is getting most of it, I am dealing with it up the ladder and hope to see it being offered more fairly, which translates in the late come in slot on 2nd shift needs to be available as a weekly rotation as that is where the stable overtime is every week.  It's against company policy if only person holds it and none of the rest of us are given the chance to rotate that late slot.  We do not bid into certain 'jobs' in that 2nd shift frock room and until about a year ago, it was mandatory that the late come in was rotated so the overtime it brings was also shared out more evenly.
Our nights are still cooling down and days under 90 now, we had higher earlier but it didn't last long, good for my electric bill here and the plants outside.  I am working on watering at night after I come home from work as I have new roses to settle in and have all that new grass in the old garden area to keep alive.
And watering means mowing more often.I am not griping as grass sure beats weeds and sand which is the other option, no watering and no ground cover here.
This summer I am doing my first mystery knit a long, a shawl and I have the yarn and needles but need to knit up the gauge swatch,  We get the first of the patten on June 21 so I have some time, and will work on getting progress made on the 2 pair of socks I have going.  1 pair is for Jake and the other is for pal Julie, just did a pair for pal Sharon who might start knitting socks soon, she does knit but has never done socks.
Well, it's time to take the dog out and water a couple plants with plant food, my only tomato is in a planter and needs fed,

4 day weekends

I ended up with 8 paid vacation days to use before the 1st of June so took a 4 day weekend to enjoy some camping time with Larry and catch up on some things here at home. We had a good time and good weather, did the festival at Clayville, went to New Salem, and came back Sunday. Then today I dealt with some paperwork, finished the socks for Sharon, got the mowing done, pulled a few weeds, and did some time with my feet up. It's dryer this year than last so I am watering the new roses, the ones I moved and the grass seed that the birds missed. The garden space is growing weeds and grass, I keep pulling weeds and watering so hope the grass seed that I scattered and the birds missed will root well and grow, spread and I manage to control the weeds and with mowing, keep them from going to seed. Now I'm watching tv up in the attic, something I have not been able to do for weeks, it is warm up here but I will not turn the central air down and freeze downstairs to cool off the upstairs. I do have the windows open up here for now and it has cooled off outside so the ceiling fan should pull some cooler air in from the dormer window. I also have 1 of the north windows open. Tomorrow I need to deal with the colon test stuff, it is part of our preventive care and is paid for so now I am getting the appointment set up. And starting a pair of Jake socks, will also cast on a pair in a cotton blend for pal Julie, have a market bag in process, since I bought a lot of crochet thread at a yard sale, friends who needed the funds, I now have to find a way to use the stuff or a way to gift it and have it gone. So, crocheting and knitting market bags will help use it up...or so I think right now.

May and we are getting April's rains

I thought it was 'April rains brings May flowers' but we seem to be getting rain and rain, which we actually need but it makes it challenging for me to work on weed control in flower beds.  But, then, the grass seed I scattered and that the birds missed finding is starting to grow.
The shake-down camping trip was quiet, not too many people out camping where we were, and the others were at 1 of the other camp sites, there were 4 different sites and we were at the one above the lake dam so had that area to our selves except for people coming down to fish.
I could have been content to just stay there the entire time but Larry found reasons for us to jump into the truck and run to town several times.
We did have some rain, were glad the camper has heat and have a new 'need/want' list for this season, including charcoal and container for it.
This weekend I have 4 days off and hope to get a lot done outside, some done inside and manage to be lazy too. Foot and I are getting along better than a year ago but it will be glad to not be in the brace for a few days.  that brace sure makes a difference for work but I won't say it's ever very comfortable.
And since I am paying for it on a monthly basis, I am very glad to say I still really like and am very glad I bought the newest iPad.  It gets used far more than the desktop or laptop computer but I have decided my 6+ year old router needs replaced with newer and faster one so I can get news and YouTube videos to load better for watching.
Jake's back in Japan but I'm not sure for how long, I plan to e-mail and Facebook him long lists of "mommy wants' but don't expect him to fill them, I keep asking for a new Honda Cub motorcycle and tell him the guys can spread the parts in their gear and then put it back together once they are stateside to resolve the shipping issues.  He's not willing to go bike hunting for me.
His jeep keeps improving, every time I drive it I end up putting some $$ into something, last week it was replace the light bulbs for the license plate since the very nice town police stopped me on the way home from work to let me know they were out.  I also did my truck which I would not have even thought about checking if I had not got stopped with the jeep.  So, no ticket, no warning and jeep has working license plate lights now.  I think windshield and back window wipers was the last time I drove it.
Today I have Crafts and Hand work at the Library this morning so I better get showered, bag packed and go play at the library. 

Friday and a 3 day weekend coming

Today is cool and gray but I will have pulled pork for lunch, it went into the slow cooker after work so I just need to run get some bread and salad stuff to go with it, I can't find the Aspercream stuff I know I own, it should be somewhere in this house and my hands would greatly appreciate it.
The flower beds will get attention this long weekend off and I hope to spend some time working with my vintage motorcycles and at the library being free labor. 
Last night the parking lot at Wal-mart had more than the usual number of semi tractors and my thoughts went west to a man there and time 2 years past.  Dreams and a hard crash into reality for both of us, it's the real world we have to live in, but those dreams helped get me through some of the hardest days of that very long accident recovery.
I am doing far better physically than was expected, I have worked hard for all that recovery and there is a long list of what I can never do, but I am dealing better with that and with finding ways to accept the limits my body now has.
I just can't do as much as I did in the past so I won't have a garden for now but will work on the planting beds and lawn, would be nice to have fewer weeds and more grass for a lawn, would be nice to get my planting beds to look better so that will get attention instead of trying to divide my time and energy between the weeding and watering those planting beds and a large vegetable garden.
And I don't feel guilty or as disappointed in myself if my body needs a rest day instead of getting done all the stuff I have on my 'to do' list.  Being able to stay at my job for as long as possible is the long goal here, to get my debt load paid off, the house paid off, work done on the house and paid for, and so if body says it needs rest, I am not being lazy or moody, I am letting my body get the needed rest so it can keep going to work  and doing the job I am being paid to do.
And there are getting to be more days I don't take anything for pain, so far they don't usually outnumber the days I do need something for pain but that is huge progress from this time last year.  And some times that over the counter pain med is for my hands or for a blasted sinus headache.  The tree pollens have been terribly high this spring and there are a couple I react to.
It's a quiet life for the most part, work, time with the man I date, the library and friends there, books and my small corner of the world but I am ok with it.  I know I made the right choices when it really mattered, have worked hard to correct the poor/wrong/stupid choices from the past but I don't regret the dreams.
I will admit that I miss the friendship I felt I had with Mike, but know it can't be fixed.
For now, I will work on what I do have here, and that means getting something to go with that pulled pork I have in the slow cooker waiting for me today.

Vacation days

It seems I have 8 vacation days to use up in the next 6 weeks, and then we start over again.  And several others in our small dept. have vacation time to get used also so we've been plotting it out on the calendar,.
With only 5 of us we do have to plan and work with each other for that vacation time to work smoothly and to get along.
It also explains why I have worked 4 weeks now with cracked bones in my left wrist, we have 4 weeks of someone on vacation and getting the arm in a cast and not working was not possible, and as the fall happened off work I only needed nursing to look at my arm, bandage the scraped areas and determine I could work.   I would not say we have the most competent medical personal in our plant.

I did manage to space out my days so I can use and enjoy them, hopefully catch up on the outside work needing done here and have some quality time with Larry also.

And as we are also starting to do our vacation days for next year, with a vacation year that goes from June 1 to May 31, I did some looking on the internet and planned for early 2013, like Good Friday, and the first event of the camping season at Clayville, and Friday of Memorial Weekend.   I also grabbed Friday of this coming Labor Day weekend, that is what calendars are for, looking ahead and planning ahead and with 20 days to use, and only 5 of them have to be taken in a group, I can spread them out better than I have this past year.

Most of our dept had put in some vacation slips before I started so I'm ok with the fact that not all are happy with my planning.  It's up to them to look and think about next spring as part of the coming vacation year and as it is not done by seniority, the first request for that date is the one that gets it.

With no vegetable garden here this year to deal with I hope to get the property looking better and have more quality play time with the man I date.  And less stress.   I also do not have a house with a leaking roof and a dishonest contractor to deal with and add to the problems and stress.

And with all that vacation time, I am taking the day we have small claims court off as 1 of my paid days.   I have not yet gotten a copy of any invoices for materials and labor break downs that we requested at the last court meeting, his lawyer is to have furnish that to us in a timely manor...gee, that has been a couple months now, wonder what happened to 'timely manor'.  And in the meantime I do make payments on a huge legal bill that I hope ends up going to the contractor, or at least in part.

Time to eat something for breakfast and then see if the dog and I can remove the spark plug from the mower, empty the oil out and make a 'parts run' so we can get the mower running and I can get some of the mowing done here.  Kid loves to be 'truck dog' and go for rides with me.

Working on Living

Tomorrow would have been my mother's 76th birthday, she passed away just over 13 years ago, my grandmom also passed away just before the start of April 20 years ago now.  So, I do look back at this time of year, at their lives and at what I got from them, that inside stuff.
Grandmom raised me most of my life so she was the bigger influence, my mother I got to know more as an adult but it was not the close relationship she had with my younger sisters.  She raised them, that was part of it, and my jealousy of that was some, and my being a living link and reminder of a past time she wanted to forget added to the mix.
But she taught me to sew and knit, she made me rip out poor quality work, mistakes and do it again until I got it right so I learned a lot that i use all the time from her.
Grandmom gave me my ethics and values and cooking lessons, cleaning lessons and gardening love.
I looked at the problems in my mother's life and what choices my Grandmom made to help guide my life, and to help me try and make better choices.
Now I draw on the strength they gave me to keep working on my life, to keep fighting for what is right, to keep liking my life and liking living my life, despite the challenges.
This time of year is not about eggs and bunnies and all that stuff for me, it's a time I look at the 2 strong women that gave me a lot of who I really am, their lives, their example and their guidance.  A time I look at both the positive and negative qualities of those women and look at who I am, what I do with my life and where I want to keep it going or what changes I need to make in that direction.
Spring is a time of renewal for me, and of renewing my direction and goals and beliefs.

Life and living it

I am working on trying to put my life and my house into better order. That damn accident has made so many things harder for me to do or keep up with, and I have used it as an excuse to let thing go, like the mountains of clean laundry that grow and grow before I finally put it away. The shoes live close to the bed, another untidy mess I am now starting to deal with. But I need to have part of them handy so I decide which pairs live just under the bed and where the others go and then put them away. And I need to work on finances, will sell part of the vacation days I still have, won't use 8 days between middle April and the end of May so selling them soon will help put the finances into better order. I should not have gotten the new iPad but sure like it and am using it a lot. So, sell some vacation time, pay down the bill for the new toy and keep a tight budget until I have some bills paid off. I'm finally almost done with re-caning the Lincoln rocker I picked up last fall. I let it sit for months but finally decided I wanted it done and usable and would not wait until it was warm enough to work outside. It is a wet job and many long hours. I will have over 30 hours into re-weaving the cane seat and back once I am finished but it really looks good and is worth far more than the $35 I paid for it.

It's really Spring here

and this year I won't have a garden but I will put more time and work into the landscaping and dog dug holes among other things.  I started clean up outside today, will work on it Saturday and hope to burn some rubbish if the wind will allow, it's been too windy to burn lately.
It's also time to get the little bike ready for the road and start working on the blue one to see if we can resolve it's issue and have it running also.
Kid is enjoying the time outside with me but he's not staying in the yard, he's not helping me clean up and he is chasing all the feral cats that neighbors keep feeding.
Work is ok, changes in what needs done, how it's done but I am working out a schedule that gets my job duties done and doesn't drive me up the wall.
My big fun this past week has to be Apple and the new release, LOL, have watched Apple for years,own a few Ipods and love to see their ads, their gadgets and what edges they are pushing, and the new Ipad2 that was so hot this time last year, 'its so 2011' and the original Ipad, it's so history, lol.
Apple keeps changing how we do so many things, and what gadgets we think we need.  And I still rarely use that pre-paid Net 10 cell phone, expect people to call the land line, leave a call back number If they want me to call them back...and own a Kindle, a Toshiba laptop, a Toshiba tablet, a Dell desktop computer and will have a new Ipad, back engraved with my name coming when it's shipped, the case for it is already on the way...like I need a new tech toy.
My boys bought gaming systems, 1 was not enough, and I admit to buying them some of those things too.  I buy dolls, yarns, fabric on occasion and tech stuff.  But I still don't need a smart phone, still don't own a mixer, still knit my own socks and do most of my own old house work.
the budget did not need my adding the payments for that Ipad, but as the back will read, My tech toy and my bills to pay.  
and now I need to go earn some of that $$$ I need to use paying all those bills I have

March already?? I hadn't got my list for January done

And now it's March, the ground is wet, the moles are running tunnels like crazy through my little bit of turf, the dog is digging like crazy when and where he can, the place looks like a land mine field.
But I still have a dry roof and a great attic space that needs a huge amount of work and $ but is my hideaway and my sewing space.
We have a local 'bug' going about, stomach/entire digestive tract kind that cleans you out and dehydrates you if a person is not careful.  I shared it with that man I date, who is recovering slower than I am but he wasn't as sick with it, he just doesn't bounce back well.
Foot and I are getting along most of the time, on a 'we tolerate each other' level.  I don't think I will do much garden this year, some is the work, some is wanting more free time for other things and some is that so much doesn't get harvested well.  I seem to have bug battles and hate to use so much insecticide as know with our sand it's soon into the water going down river.
Living alone still works well for me, it's not that I don't think about how life could have been different but I am able to accept what I cannot change and move on with my life.
Jake's enjoying most of this deployment, he's been in Japan, he's been in Thailand, he's met so many people, seen so much, learned so much, grown so much, but still wants mom to knit him socks and bake him bread and cookies when she can.
People are one of those things in life that you can't change, they are and will be who they are, they might try to be different for a while but it doesn't last, or they might build a false image of who they want you to think they are but it does fall apart sometime. 
So, I pick up the pieces of my life and work on building my life, and now and then I look back at that past, or I stumble over an old memory, a dream tucked away and wonder why he wasn't honest about stuff that would come out in time, why when I did find out, he didn't see I was asking him to be honest and give us something we could fix and make work. 
Now, I don't make space in my life for anyone who could build a life with me, there is no place for long term, make a team stuff, there's this workable 2 single people who share time together, as we can and will make the time.  Not a future together thing, but a today thing and for Larry and I, that is what works, we care about each other but we have our own homes, our own lives and patterns and we work that well.
And I have my old house, my dolls and my creative arts, my few friends and my dig and silly loud parrots and I have peace.  Not problems other people have drug into my life, not financial disasters that I have to help dig out from. 
And not the dreams I once had, and some days I miss that having dreams stuff.

witing on the IRS

Still no sign of my tax refunds but they will come eventually.  In the meantime I go to work every day, spend quality time with Larry, do stuff at the local library weekly, and am enjoying my attic space.  The knitting goes slowly, but a pair of socks are on their way to Jake and I have started another 1, that is not a pair, it's 1 sock, I did not divide the skein into 2 balls so will be doing first 1 sock and then the mate. 

I did design and knit a doll sweater, or more honestly, I cast on, ripped it out, cast on, knit a bit, ripped out and cast on a 3rd time, knit the body of the sweater and then started to write the pattern out.  It did not make sense to start writing anything down until I had something that worked.  I'm currently 'playing' with my Goodreau dolls, I have 2 that are 16 and 17 inches tall, long slim teens or so they look and I hope to get some outfits made for both of them.

It is being a mild winter here so far, better for me than last winter.  I make progress, the old house makes progress, the debt load goes down a bit, the mortgage goes down some.

And for the most part, the pain is livable, the life is pretty good and I am content. 

crazy weather and taxes

It has gone from 60 down to 17 in less than 20 hours here, the trees and shrubs have no clue what is happening and the creeping charlie just keeps growing and spreading every time it's above 32,  Great weed but not the ground cover plant I really want here.

I am waiting for the next utility bill so I have a closer idea to what my heating costs are running this winter.  With the attic space to heat now and only insulation up I am expecting a rise from last year this time but I am not running that dehumidifier 24/7 so know that should help balance it out some.

And it's tax time, my state is filed, my fed should be if I have the # from last year's adjusted gross right, I ad it off by $2 and was rejected so this is the 2nd time to send it.  I should have double checked with the paper return and not just trusted the software.  The paper return was in the file just 2 feet away so there's no reason for being that lazy.

Friend Julie has hers done and is mailing them in, no fees to pay that way and I am NOT covering fees this year for friends who use my paid for software and my printer and paper and ink, which I need to buy again. Tax time uses up a lot of ink and so does printing out free doll knitting patterns.

Jake's taxes are started and Jake is on my tax bad list again this year.  His state with holding is still MO and should have been IL last year and this year and he needs to change that with his command or pay office.  It is NOT something Mom can fix but Mom gets stuck with dealing with the tax filing fun it creates and I don't find it loads of fun.

I do have a list started for my tax refunds this year, new glasses as my work insurance does not pay the full cost and I need them replaced and new exam.  Pay off Lowes and put ceilings in my attic space, that does include the sloped/angled parts too so that's a lot of paneling to buy and pay for some help to install but it should go reasonably fast.

I do have wiring work that needs done first, the wiring for south baseboard heater needs in so I can panel the south wall and the ceiling lights need at least wired even if I only buy cheap fixtures for now.  The breaker and junction box have been up for years, I have most or all the materials so there is NO reason to not get it done but being lazy.

Foot and I are getting along most of the time, got up this morning with it not wanting to support me, that is not real abnormal but sure sucks to start the day that way.  I expect to end the day that way but don't usually start the day with that much pain and handicap issues.

I have several dolls on that tax wish list and am not sure any of them will get bought, but am having fun looking on line after work, don't have a book I am reading so it's look at dolls on line and look at prices.
In the meantime,  I have a job that pays the bills here, date a really good man, can afford to heat my little old house and like my life.

that Springfield trip

I found a great new friend but Larry didn't thing we could sneak him out or get him into my truck.

Starting the New Year

We went from warm to cold and now back to warming up some. It's a weather crazy winter here and I've been hit with my 2nd cold this winter and spent most of Sunday sleeping, taking cold meds and drinking fluids before sleeping some more. Finances are snug but livable, debt load is going down a tiny bit at a time, old house isn't making much progress this winter but part of that is my putting off work I could be doing. I am content here, and like my life and job. That goes a long way to help balance the days that have a lot of pain. All the passive solar gain upstairs sure helps warm that area up, I take my oatmeal up there most mornings to eat in the sunshine and enjoy my space. Have stuff I need to get done today before I head to work and time is going by so fast, but I am gaining on that blasted cold, know I got it at the plant so will be taking it back to the plant. Sure glad I spend most of my time there tucked away in my own space and work at my own pace.

Collection agency calling for someone else

Was enjoying my attic nest and watching Avatar, ya, I know, I have watched it before, several times actually when the phone rang. I expected it to be Larry, that guy I date and have lunch plans today with but it was Isobel trying to reach or locate Michael R. Ferrin. She did ask if he was my son, 'no, a man I used to date' she did leave a phone number and extension # and would like a call back before 8 p.m. central time. So, since I don't have a current e-mail address, and I don't have a current phone #, I will post it here and Mike, if you do read my blog now and then, you will get the message. Isobel 1-800-788-7870, ext. 3334. I also did google the number and it's a collection agency but it seems a lot of the people who were called by this # did NOT have the owe the debts that the caller was chasing and it seems that there might be some fraudulent claims and harassment being committed by whoever is calling from this #. It's not my business, not my debt and I have stuff at our local library every Thursday between 10-noon and then lunch with Larry before I go to work. Just love it when debt collectors call here looking for other people and they do, cell phone gets calls looking for who had that cell # before me, I get calls looking for the people I bought this house from, a man I was married to and have been divorced from for years and have not seen or head from for more than 10 years, for Mike and occasionally for my oldest son. Gee, if I could give them the address/phone/e-mail for any I would and let them be bothered instead of me. I am working hard to pay off my debt load, I go to work even when it is hard to even walk. I pay on my debts first before anything else, I keep a tight budget so I can pay off those debts as fast as I can. I don't like getting these calls and do what I can to get them to not call here but every time calls looking for Kenn Gean or Mike Ferrin come, I am reminded how stupid I was to believe these men, at least where it came to financial matters with Mike. I don't think much else was lies. With Kenn Gean, it was all lies and deception..and my being a stupid trusting fool. So, don't expect trust to come easy for me, don't expect me to put any confidence in others and don't expect me to pay any bills that aren't mine.

The Annual Christmas Letter

Another year and I'm still working on this old house and still working at Cargill. But the old house has a new metal roof, new dormer and spiral stairs and I am now in hourly management at the plant instead of supply. I don't hear from Stormy but understand from Cami, her oldest daughter, my oldest granddaughter, that she is fine. Bryon is out in CA and likes it there in the L.A. area, he catches me on line now and then but our hours rarely match up. Ben is working carpentry in this area, and I see him some, he helped put the metal roof on my house and with the stairs and work in the attic. Jake is in Japan and our hours don't match often but I do catch him on line now and then. If he doesn't stay in the Marines, this should be his last deployment overseas. I am not making fast progress on the work here but have a great usable space in the attic now, it will be a while before there is a bathroom up there and walls, ceilings but it's insulated and I will work on it as I have funds and time. And I have great natural light and plenty of sewing space now. We've had rain so far and just a skiff of snow, tonight I had ice on the windshield to scrape before I could leave the parking lot. But we are not having a bad winter yet this year. It's been a long year but my foot is doing better, a brace from Hanger Prosthetic has helped a lot with work and pain but I am not ever going to dance or skip. I have come to terms with the life changes that accident has made in my life and my body but it's been a long and hard battle with some of that adjusting. I am also finding some ability to forgive and let go with some people, I don't know why I was lied to about financial issues but do feel that it was not done to deliberately deceive me and create a mess of my life or use me. I do know my life works for me, here and living alone. I don't want the demands or needs of another person on my shoulders at this time. Occasional playmate and company works well, can work with my job and my old house and my foot and it's pain issues. Finances are improving, not fast but at least there is some progress, I still have a huge amount of high interest credit debt but it is going down every month and I am paying extra on the house payment and it's paid early every month so that helps too. And I'm still dating the same man I have been for 10+ months, he lives a few blocks away and has been widowed for over 3 years now, retired and it's his camper we take camping and his garage that my little Honda passport is spending the winter in. Wishing one and all a very good holiday season and a good year to come.

IF I had died in that car accident

The leaking roof on this old house would not be replaced with a metal roof. And all the stuff I had stored in that attic area might have been ruined. A small fortune in books and fabrics that my estate might have yard saled or tossed out in the rubbish bin. Now, as I un-box those books, I am taking some to the local library. Their set of Time life home improvement books fell apart from much use several years ago and there has been no funds to replace them so mine will have a great home there and I can go use them when I need or want too. Those other books on furniture making and cabinet making and kids projects and crafts, they too have a better home at the public library. Now, as I am almost 2 years from the date of that accident, I am moving forward with living, with settling into my attic space as I gain progress with work up there. I will turn fabric into quilt tops and some will be gifted away, some will be machine quilted and gifted away, I don't need to hoard fabrics or books, and I don't need to stash away yarns and not use them. Thursdays are my out and about day before I head to work, and I will take time to enjoy having a life and I will work on living that life, not waiting until later, there might not be a later. I am working on forgiving, some has come easier than others, some things are easier to just let go and put into the past, some will take more time, hurt deeper, and my brain wants to understand, to know why before it can find forgiveness and move on, but I will keep working on those ones. I'm finding more laughter once again, and peace and balance are becoming a part of my life once more. I still get angry too easy, frustrated far too fast, but I am working on that too and ok if I don't make fast progress. I no longer feel guilty or obligated, my life, my paycheck and my right of choices. That too, is progress in my life. And now I will get ready and head to work once again, glad to be going to work, glad to be able to work, glad to have a job with good pay and benefits. And really glad to come home to my small old house that is dry and warm and mine.

Happy thanksgiving

It's cool and gray here in central IL but the house is warm and dry. The birds are content and Kid is being good for now. I will be going out for my meal, quality time with quality friends, and no clean up. Work is busy and overtime every weekend right now, is helping me pay down debt load and the truck got much needed back tires. Hopefully, soon I will be putting some of that overtime into the work on this old house, but it's nice to be ahead on the bills and I will soon be down to 4 years on my house mortgage and am paying extra every month on that which makes me feel more secure too. There's not much on the Black Friday sales that even interests me, but I will look next Sunday while I am in Springfield for the yearly Christmas party with my doll club. And my gift exchange is part done, the sweater knit, finished and washed, now to make a top and pants that go with it. I have a nice selection of lace weight yarns for doll knitting and have 2 other sweaters going, 1 will be a gift if done on time. Jake is off with his platoon, headed to Japan right now, and he's doing well and is usually in good spirits, his jeep is here, IL plates and insured, and locked up, it needs new back tires but I don't know if I will get that done before he is home again. I will get some stuff into the gas tank for winter and start it now and then but don't need to run it and neither does any one else. It's so great to have a solid roof and be started on the attic changes/expansion project. Right now I am not getting much done up there but I will progress a little at a time, on a schedule that I can handle and not be beat tired and not add to my debt load. I need to finish up the insulation work and have the insulation for that, need to do some wiring work and will have the materials for that soon, and then it will be ceilings, and wall coverings and build that new bathroom. I hope this year my tax refund will build the bathroom walls, last year paid off a debt and that was a good decision but this year I want to be able to put the refund into my attic project. But I am making good progress with so many things, compared to where I was this time last year. So, it's a year I have a lot to be thankful for and to be looking forward to the coming year.

Cool and windy today

And we had hard rains again in the night but house stays dry now and that is such a huge and great change. I can sure tell I am not done with insulation work in the attic today, it's usually warm up here and today it's not and I do have heat going. But I will get a bit more work done, did buy new blades for the circular saw at Wal-Mart on the way home after work and picked up some more stuff from the storage unit. Part is still in the truck. I don't think Ben got by last night to update things on Jake's X-Box so it will play music with my I-pod and I wanted that done, guess he won't be using vehicles here if he can't do something small like that for me. And since his borrow my truck yesterday was to take housemate to work early, did not put gas in my truck and that is going up in cost, at least 15 cents higher than it was when I got off work Monday, I am not thrilled about his using my wheels or Jake's which I am supporting and responsible for while he is gone. Work has some drawbacks, I am being pushed to do more and faster by the new lead, and I do like her but I am not going to be able to get everything done and done early, it's just not possible and if she's trying to cut on the payroll, then she needs to look at who is doing the most overtime and how she can deal with that person 'padding' her paycheck with staying late. She's the 1 who finishes up and there is no one to see that she does her work in a timely manor. . . ya, there is a huge reason she takes home between $100-200+ more than any of the rest of us every week... But, for the most part I am content with my life, date a good man and we have plans for Thanksgiving and back up plans just in case we don't want to be out on the roads. He's probably cussing this wind and temps getting colder, makes him hurt more, heck it makes most of us hurt more. But we both have a place to live, money to pay our bills, like our lives, and manage to be ok with how life goes that we can't change and take care of what needs taken care of. I will spend time putting time in here in the attic on work that needs done and down stairs, get the house into better order and more comfortable to live in. This attic space is giving me over 500 more square feet of very usable space and in time will give me a second bathroom too. My down stairs will get less crowded and easier to keep clean and in better order, some changes down there will improve air flow through the house and help make the furnace and central air more efficient By summer I will have a good window blanket blind made for both the east window and the south so the sun doesn't cook this attic space. By summer I should have a bathroom up here in the attic and have ceiling in the laundry area done and a lot more stuff taken care of. I am doing better this winter than I was last winter, am having less pain with my foot/leg and taking less for pain. My life is calmer and more settled, my finances are more stable and my house is sure in better condition with that new roof finally done. Last fall this time I was just adjusting to being back at work, facing a long and hard winter and dealing with the emotional issues that both the accident and an unwise relationship brought into my life. Now I am moving forward with my life, making it work for me and meet my needs and wants. I have grown stronger and more capable, for the most part and have been working on cleaning up the messes the past has made in my life and in my head. And it's time to get busy with work in the attic, got that circular saw a new plywood blade and need to put it to work.

My attic hidaway

It is a long way from finished but I am ale to watch movies and have moved my laptop up here for now. I worked today on getting most of the west storage area wall done, and on putting down sub floor in the gap in front of the landing. I still have to put the light switch back for the laundry area and then that wall can be opened up just a bit more. I am going to start moving my things out of rented storage now, and will continue to put up the short walls as I have time and energy. Working 6 sifts a week is hard on me, my body and especially my hands hurt all the time. But I have a dry house and I am almost done with the insulation in my attic space and I am sure I will get the walls done and the ceiling in and build a bathroom too. It's great to have more space in the house, and I will work on getting stuff moved around and the place cleaned up more. By this time next week I want my sewing stuff upstairs and the antique chest of drawers in my bedroom where the sewing stuff now lives. And if I move a load every night after work, I should have a big part of my things home and not in storage. It will be a huge challenge to get the new sofa upstairs and I think it will take more than Ben and I to get it done. But in a few weeks this attic space will become my winter hide out. My dolls will finally have a place they belong and I will have a dedicated place for my sewing and my books and a place to watch movies or listen to music and to hide from the world in general.

Roof is done

And I am so pleased with the new metal roof, the new dormer and the stairs. I have a lot more work to do before my new attic space is done but will have it usable soon and stuff moved in/up there and settle in for the winter. Almost all the insulation work is done and I will soon be putting osb up on the walls of the storage space under the eaves. It will take a while to build in all the storage cubbies I will have, and the dolls have their own nook too. And I will make a dedicated space for that over-sized dog I have. Where he can watch out the east window. Soon I will be planning out that second bathroom, know where it goes, but not size or how I am laying out the toilet, sink and shower. It does get a glass pocket door and will face the new east window but is off set from it so it will be about impossible for any one outside to see into that bathroom unless they are up a ladder and against my new window. The house feels cool, furnace is set at 70 and temp on the thermostat has 72 for room temp. The dryer is running, Ben must have done laundry late and put clothes in not long before I got home from work. The attic or upstairs is warmer than downstairs right now. I do have thermometer up there but need a good digital one and set in the northeast corner as that should be the coolest spot. It will take several years to know what my utility costs will average or be as they will keep changing as I get more done here. I am not running the dehumidifier now and it used to run most of the time to dry out this house from the leaking roof problems. But I have gained a lot more space so that will cost to heat. I have less drafts in some places but I did not get the north bathroom window pulled and a new one put in so that is still going to be a cold and draft problem this winter but have plans to be doing it as soon as weather warms up in the spring. Even if we have a warm spell before hard winter sets in, I won't have enough done to move every thing out of the bathroom that has to be moved out and tear out the old window, have Pat help put in the new one and then get things closed up, replaced/repaired and so forth so I have the bathroom back in usable and tolerable order. Maybe by spring I will have my upstairs bath usable and the one here on the ground floor ready for new window, move the tub, move the door to laundry area...dream on, not sure where funds will come from but there is hope that small claims court gains me back most of the deposit from C.L. Campbell Construction as they did default on the contract. Well, I need to get something to eat and then tuck me into bed, know I will be busy before work, lots to do, including clean up outside from the construction, figure where to store the left over metal as most of it will end up on the porch roof as soon as I can afford to buy what else is needed and pay for the labor, and get back on Pat's work list. He will also frame in the new bathroom once I have it planned out and know how big and where exactly those walls need to go. And the new space gets a 40" flat screen to go with the new sofa and Jake's x-box. Momma is going to hide up there and watch Star Trek and silly girl movies this winter and play with her dolls and yarns.

That attic space

I know it will be a long time before it's totally finished, but I will start using it as soon as I can. I love the fact that no windows face the busy street in front of my house, I can feel I am hidden away when I am up there. I do love having Jake home and Krisda is great to have here but I am so glad they are in MO for the weekend and the dog, birds and I have our usual after work quiet house. And I could go over to Larry's and he'd be glad to have me there but I just want to be here, and have Kid in the house, instead of outside on his chain, breath the air here, no cats or carpet or furnace noises. It wasn't too long ago that I had a furnace in the bedroom and loud but it moved to the new utility area and I have gotten used to a much quieter house and Larry's trailer has the furnace close to his bedroom so it is much louder. The house is cool but that is the dormer and attic under construction stuff and it will start to improve as I get insulation in and when Pat gets that dormer closed in, the window are is framed but the window is not installed yet and there's a lot yet to be closed up on the east side of that dormer, plenty of fresh air right now, cold fresh air. I will have to make insulated curtains for the south and east windows before spring comes or they will be real heat problems but I will sure enjoy the passive solar gain this winter. I do need to close off the cold though so will be working on those curtains once I have the rough work done up there and can start using my new area. I did my wellness stuff on line for our work insurance updating and think it's stupid and computer generated that does not give a true picture of the real person or the real life. I have a lot of pain, ya, and there is no place to enter the accident and foot damage or the fact that my hands have carpal tunnel and are getting old. I have a lot of stress and there is no place to put in the why of that stress, old house with no real roof, winter coming and no way to heat the open house, a lot of money paid to a very dishonest contractor and now waiting for small claims court. It would be abnormal to not have some stress and depression over the roof situation or my pain that the car accident has created and that I will live with the rest of my life. It's like asking if I have a lot of headaches, yes but it's not the same as other people-unless they have my allergies and sinus problems. I rarely have stress headaches, or non car accident related pain, other than my hands. So, the on line questions do not really give a clear picture of me and of my pain or depression or my life. And it's really OK to be just ok, not happy, but ok, content, at peace, mellow. And it's ok if I am comfortable alone and like living alone. I see people every day I go to work and I what I feel is a good relationship with the guy I date but I don't want to live at his place, he sure doesn't want to move here and his cat is NOT welcome to move here, my dog and birds will not be moving to his place. I have plenty of 'support system' and don't need to give out names and contact information, I really do not need to be reported on or bugged by my on line, company medical stuff. I will just continue to handle my little life and the details in that little life.I do check my blood pressure and I will add in the other stuff, like when I had my last pap smear, I don't remember when, ok, so it was probably last January but I sure don't know the exact date. Washer is almost done so I can toss that load into dryer and have it going, I had to replace the light bulb in the laundry area, the first time I have had to do that since I put that light fixture in. So, as it's a vanity bulb, it had to be1 that was remove when we gutted the original bathroom. I guess I won't complain about a lightbulb that lasted 6+ years and I did have a replacement so that's been done and I can see to load the washer or dryer in the night. Better get this saved or posted and head to laundry space and then bed, I do want to work in the attic before I go work at Cargill for overtime.

A quiet house again

It's great to have Jake and Krisda here, but it's been busy and loud. Today, they, with Ben headed west to MO to visit for the weekend and I get to clean house a bit, maybe go to a yard sale, go to work and just enjoy the quieter house for a while. The construction work is going ok, not as fast as I would like but the metal roof should be going on starting Monday, I have a lot of the insulation bought and here, and will buy more Sunday while I am in Springfield and it looks like we will have dry weather for a week or so and I plan to start insulation work while the kids are gone and also prime some of the osb that will be going over that insulation in the storage areas so I can get those closed off as soon as I can and the attic starts getting more usable and warmer. The dormer is close to done, the window is waiting and I will be glad to see that dormer done, the stairs assembled and quit using a ladder to get in and out of my new attic space. Work is going ok, foot is doing better with the brace and I will look at taking it back in to Hanger for some tweaking with the fit soon. I needed time for it and me and the new, 1/2 size larger work boot to adjust and we are about to that place. I take the kids back up north to Krisda's dad the 27th and had planned a crafting thing at the local library but won't be able to attend. Jake needs a day or so with her family before this deployment and this time instead of storage at base, his stuff came home and I will be tucking it up in the attic on the south end in some of that new storage area we will have. I don't know when I will be going to court with the contractor that did not do the work he agreed to and took a large deposit on but expect sometime the middle of November for that and hope to get back a large amount of that $$ but won't plan to put it into the bathroom upstairs until I actually have that money. So, it's getting cold and I don't like that but sure like all the sun through the south attic window. It will be a long time before the entire area is done, bathroom is high on the list but hope by tax time to look at contracting out the drywall work and see that done and paint when spring comes.

Old House progress

the carpenter is making good progress on getting the west side of the house ready for the metal roofing, rain is now slowing down work but he's here when he can be on the roof. And Ben helped me with the start of framing in a small short closet/hanging area in the south west part of the attic. I still have the support to put in the south east side, that area will be a 2 'x14' doll display area once done. And I have a couple more studs to put in along the west wall, will get them done this week and also hope to start insulating and closing up the west eaves, once the carpenter gives me the 'go ahead'. The dormer will be built as 'shed' or lifted roof, 1 clean line that will have no seams to later leak. It will give me a lot of east light with the new window, enough headroom for the spiral stairs and will look nice and not tacked on. I want the house to end up with a lot of nice curb appeal and be comfortable to live in, and work for me, meet my needs and be easy to care for, and low maintenance over time. I have not been able to 'see' the sewing/work space yet but will as I get more work done and get the tools and supplies out of that area. It will take months to get all the work done and I don't know how much of my deposit with the contractor will be returned or when, I expect to be in small claims court in mid-November. Those funds will go into the work here once I get them but am not counting on spending the money until I have it in hand. It's not a perfect life and I will always have pain and problems with my foot from that accident, and I will be dealing with the emotional issues probably that long. But I'm not having the amount of depression I was 6 months ago.

That new Boot

 

this is that new support boot I am starting to really like. It will barely fit in 1 pair of my steel toed work boots, big toe is rubbing on the end of that steel toe but new ones, same style, 1/2 size larger are ordered and Cargill pays the full price for up to 2 pair of work boots per year for me, nice.
It is making a difference, but my left hip joint hurts more. I think as my body adjusts to the boot, and I get a larger work boot, that hip pain will reduce. I know I walk with more balance and closer to the pace I walked at before this accident and I no longer feel ugly and clumsy and 'gross' and that is a huge plus.
A huge improvement in my life, both at work and home, I am not in as much pain and I am not as tired.

Love the lawyer's letter

got my copy yesterday, nice, polite and to the point, and has a 7 day period from date of letter, not date received for work here to start or we look at my options, including legal ones. Now, we know legal ones are just what I am going to do. And mean, nasty and tough is just what I will be, with a lawyer known for that also. In the meantime, I cannot find the notebook with my doll knitting patterns anywhere, did reprint some out but ran out of printer ink. My bed is piled high with stuff that I got out to look for patterns, move stuff, move stuff, and pile on my bed. If the contractor had done the work, which I did pay a hefty deposit for, in a timely, like he promised, in writing manor, I would not have a bed piled with stuff, I would have a workspace in that attic studio, it might not have built in shelving yet but it would have my sewing/knitting/doll stuff up there. The bathroom would not have a chest of drawers in it, and more doll/sewing stuff. My living room would not have a huge antique chest of drawers in the way. And I have cleaned and dealt with the mess, and worked up in that attic space for months, have stuff now in rented storage and will have it there for another month at least. So, I won't get happy with this contractor, will be getting a inspector to come do a report on the very little work that has been done by CL Campbell Construction and what heeds done to do what I want and have a contract for, right. And that is how they can do it or face court action and not get paid any more. If work is not started and kept going until they are done, I do plan court action. I also will be deducting some of the costs their delay has cost me, like how long the roll off disposal bin has been here, the 2nd month of storage fees for my stuff and the costs of a lawyer. After all, to do the job right, they had to do a new contract and raise the price $2000. It's only right that they get my costs for their choice of delaying this job. And if there is any damage from rain, it becomes their costs also, as they removed the roof, and did not get it re-roofed in a timely manor. That law here and they do know it. I would be interested to know if the senior partner has been aware of all the issues here or if dad was kept in the dark. But he was here 8/31 and so should have kept tabs and kept the work going then. I won't get happy just because they get the job done, they don't know me, if it's not done right, if it's not done in a very timely manor I will take action. And if it's not started within that 7 day period on the letter, it's legal action. And since our plant works Saturdays, I do expect If they get back to work here, they work Saturdays until the job is done and expect the job to take less than 2 weeks. In the meantime, I have a doll club meeting today, need a shower and need to take Kid with me to go buy a length of log chain to fasten him to the tree while I am at work or gone, as he's broken the cable, broken the new dog chain I just bought yesterday. There are rodents in that damn roll off and he wants to go play there and hunt them out. The same roll off that should have been out if this yard by late July so another reason for me to be displeased with the damn contractor.

have a Lawyer, letter going out

today to the contractor. and lawyer says I have done very good at keeping things in order, and on the right side of the law. Letter first and very limited time for contractor to get the job done and done to my satisfaction. We will go to court very fast if need be and won't spend much time going back and forth with contractor.
That is good news and my purple sweater is done and looks great, the furnace is turned on and needed, the sun is out and the new doll trunk arrived and my resin Goodreau fits nicely along with his clothing and shoes. I do need some hangers that will fit in the case but it sure beats the cardboard box he came in.
Work stinks, but that is due to a change in the area the cleaned equipment is sorted. It's a longer walk, and tight corners, cold and damp so yes, I am in a snit, and it's taking longer to do those racks and also wash the mesh gloves during the same time frame. I am NOT going to go back and forth between the 2 areas. I will work a rack and when it's done I haul it up and park it close to where the mesh wash room is, do some mesh and then haul the rack on through the cafeteria and to where it goes.
I will adjust and adapt, my work load has increased and I am in a snit and will not get happy about it, nor will I be concerned if I am working overtime, not my decision to dump me with a larger work load.

fed up with working on the attic project

I need to get some help and put down the last of the sub floor, but I am taking a break before making any phone calls for help, I am just really tired of this attic project, it's been on going since mid June, contractor has delayed and delayed, started job and then left it for 2+ weeks. Now it's September and still not done, it's getting cool nights and I still don't have that area insulated even.
Ben's not been good help, some hired help was a joke, a rather expensive joke, Dean from work is good help but I know he had plans for this weekend so won't call. Otto will come help and together we will manage the center section on the south end. It will be the hard spot now, and first piece is lined up and will take 2 people to get it to lock up the tongue on this sheet with the groove on the one it has to go into.
But I have almost every thing into storage that needs to go, and have most of the clean up done and we have close to 3/4 of the sub floor down.
It's a different Labor Day than last year, that was recovering from my accident and dealing with ending a relationship before it cost me far more $$ than it already had.
And 2 years ago, it was single and battling weeds in the garden, and trying to get the budget tighter to get through the winter and come out with less debt load.
I'm ok with most of where my life is at this year, this time but this new roof/attic conversion has really gotten to be stressing, and most of that stress is a contractor.
I will survive, the house will get a metal roof, I will get my attic studio area and the debt load has shrunk some in the past year.
I have made a lot of recovery from that auto accident, have moved on with my life, not dating any lying, debt ridden men now, and not dating any who play head games.
I still have a garden full of weeds, and a yard and flower beds that burnt up this summer with all our heat and my neglect.
I will always have a small old house that needs work but I am ok with that most of the time, and now it's time to get back to work on that damn attic job.

slow progress but at least the job is going again

Apparently my call and willingness to get a lawyer about this roof job got action, including the senior partner to become aware of what was or rather was not being done on this job. Now the entire roof has been stripped and decked and this time all the clean up outside was done and I was not left with a mess and tarps and trash around.
I am photographing and documenting as things go or don't get done here, and will not hesitate to make a few phone calls and yes, a lawyer if need be.
I have storage unit rented and am getting all my stuff out of the attic and stored while the job is being done and do not plan to have storage rented for more than 1 month, 2 if I am waiting on drywall/painting job to get finished.
It's hard to believe all the stuff I have had tucked away and stored in that attic all these years, not much trash to toss out, not much needs sorted before stored but I am doing some cleaning and will clean and oil my antique rockers and such before they are stored.
Larry and I had a good day up north, Colchester and huge flea market and I came home with another rocking chair that needs both back and seat re-caned. It is very similar to the one I just finished the back on, they will look good together in the new attic space.
We had rain in the night and early morning so it's cooled down and the attic is comfortable working in. Right now I am working alone but will get Otto's help when I am ready to get the bigger items down out of the attic and haul them to the storage unit. I think 1 have about 3loads to go but I am also taking some of the stuff that's in my way on the ground floor too.
I need to get sub floor down, most is done but have the south east section left to do and might even get some down today. I am off work and paid tomorrow so can do it then if I don't get to it all today.
I will never give C.l. Campbell Construction a good reference, they might do good work and reasonable costs but the delays and bull shit I have had to deal with already make a company I would not wish on anyone. No one deserves to have a job jerked around and be left with the mess and roof open for several weeks at a time like I have been here.
But I will have a blue metal roof, and as soon as I can, will be doing the wiring and insulation work that needs done before drywall can be installed. And I hope I can afford to contract that out. Will get bids as soon as I can but it won't be for 2-3 weeks.

No roof progress, bike parts ordered and in shipping,

Larry is working on my blue bike again, have condenser and points coming, and I am working in the attic every day..contractor has not been here for over a week, did send a letter..and will be looking at legal action if work does not get going and done...
Have an appointment with Hanger Prosthetic for custom work boot for damaged foot.
And there's a new guy in my life, he doesn't have a name yet but came with plenty of clothes and I also ordered 4 patterns his size, ok, so 2 were girl stuff but I do have a lot of dolls here and all like clothes.
I am working on the sub floor in the attic, the guy form work didn't do much but did it all wrong, glad he didn't use many screws to fasten it down, have most of them out and 2 pieces loose.
I might have help coming Saturday to work with me and I hope to get most of that sub floor down, stuff will have to be moved, take up what is down and done wrong, put it down right, move stuff I have stored up there, put down more sub floor..but at least I will be seeing some progress.
Overtime on this week's paycheck, nice to have a good paycheck, sure beats being on disability. I've worked hard to keep that damn accident from taking any more from me and from my life, my quality of life than I have absolutely had to give up.
I know the odds are high that I will not be able to work until retirement age but I am sure going to try and if that means big, ugly work boot that has supports up my lower leg, well, I can live with that.

no progesss on the roof..

This really is a contractor with licenses and good rep who does good work and in a timely manor. But that is not what is happening here. It took 4 days(plus weekend) to get the east side stripped and decked. It's been since Tuesday that anyone came and worked on the roof here. In the meantime I can't do work inside the attic and the house is so open that I have the air shut off, there is no reason to pay the bill to try and cool a house with this much draft issues.
I am trying to not let it stress me, I get upset, stressed and depressed and I spend $$ on stuff I don't need and sometimes later don't want..and right now I am spending a lot of time looking at big screen tv's on sale, and I don't have the place to put one until the attic is much closer to done.

I'm working late most night this week because Barb has called in 3 shifts in a row, so my foot and leg hurt more and all the time. That adds to my being unhappy with life..it's a no win circle right now, I am going to try and not let it drive me into any dark holes or have me wasting money that later I will regret.
But the high point is our annual company picnic is this Sunday, here in town and Larry and I are going..the first I have been able to attend in something like 4 years...
And the dog is not longer scratching himself until he has sores so the medication has helped that. I know life here has some rough spots but for the most part, it's workable and I like my life. I don't like this roof project and the long drawn out, not get the job started, get it finally started and then not get with the work and get it done stuff..but I will make another call, again, and hope that Monday I will have a crew here and the job will get completed and done right...

No more old houses

the roof job is finally started, 5+weeks after it was supposed to be started. Guy at work who said he knew how to do many things cannot lay sub floor correctly, he and another guy quit before they ruined much of my materials, what they did put down will have to be pulled up and put down correctly.
Foot hurts all the time, I am still getting medical bills that should have been paid with the settlement so will have to check on that, have already sent several bills to State Farm again, ones I know were part of that settlement.
Cami's facebook posts have me wondering if her mother is doing the same stuff to Cami that she did to me, over and over for years. I am staying away, staying here and keeping my life workable.
Looking at my house plans, attic project plans and trying to make wiring decisions for lighting and thinking on what I want for t.v. up there, how big, do I want to move the big 52" one from the living room up and then put something else down here, or do I want to buy a new flat screen for that attic space currently called "Jake's room"
I know it will be my retreat, I want to be able to sit and watch movies while I do hand work so lighting is an issue and so is what I have for t.v up there. I have to make wiring decisions before I insulate as I need to wire first. And so am working out ideas on paper now.
Life is livable but that damn accident keeps making ugly waves in my life. I know my foot will never get better, I know I will always have pain but thought by now I would quit getting medical bills from it. It's been more than a month, close to 2 months since the settlement date.
I will make a phone call after I get up and see if the one on my desk can be sorted out and hope it's their error. Damn place would not bill my medical insurance from work as they have agreement to take a lower amount..and now are charging a late fee..and I would not be surprised to learn they have been paid by State Farm and weeks ago...
Need to wind down and get some sleep, it's already after 3 am and I should have been asleep 2 hours ago--oh,ya I was still working 2 hours ago...

Still No contractor, made a phone call

We are a month behind the scheduled start, and he's still not here. The disposal bin is still empty and in my back yard, I still have a window in my living room, a spiral stair that cannot be installed and a serious lack of tolerance for 'Monday' and 'early next week' which has came and gone several weeks now.
Today's call again got his voice mail, today's message is that I need him to either get here and do the contracted job or refund my deposit and I will get someone else to do the job. This delay is fouling up my life.
Along with a huge chunk of my settlement funds, the other work I need done up there in the attic on hold for the most part, the garden has gone to weeds while I worked up in the attic to clean up the insulation so ceiling joices were ready for sub floor and stuff moved away from areas where work needed to be done.
I am stressed out to the max over this and my foot is in pain most of the time from work, I need this roof replaced, the dormer built, the spiral stair kit installed, the sub floor down, the wiring on end walls done, the insulation work done. And want it done this month..not next month, not next year.
And to top it off, I am getting calls from collection agencies looking for a man I have not see or heard from for more than 11 years, who never shared a home with me during our short marriage. He did not manage to scam me out of any amount of money, he did verbally abuse me and would have physically abused me if I had not gotten him out of my life when I did. I made a huge mistake trusting him, not seeing the man behind the mask, but I wasn't the stupid fool he thought I was, he never had his name on my home, vehicle or accounts that mattered, or access to much.
So, now it's been close to 12 years since I even heard his voice on a phone, I am getting collection agencies calling here, 2 in 2 days, looking for him.
He could be dead, I have no contact numbers, have not had, and I didn't really have that when I thought we were trying to make a life together.
So, not my problem, calling me does not gain them anything,

and right now it's not even making waves in my pond, just find it funny...
Just when I think my life has problems and is a mess, I get calls from collection agencies looking for Ken Gean or for Michael Ferrin... guess my life has some issues and stuff I need to take care of but at this time I don't have collection agencies calling me because I am behind on payments, or have just not paid my bills and am trying to duck out on them.
And I will either see the contractor here and work being done or I will see my deposit back and give the job to Raffa and his crew. If necessary I will take legal action, not something I want to do, but I am not going to just 'give away' a huge chunk of my settlement funds.
Today I see the podiatrist and hopefully we start to find some ways to lessen my pain and walking issues with my damaged foot. I need to keep working, I need to get through my work shift and not be miserable long before the shift is done.
I will get the garden dealt with, will get the insulation and sub floor out of my truck and up into the attic, will get finished with the wiring on the north wall so it can be insulated, will finish the insulation work on the south attic wall that I do have started.
And I am making changes in the plans for the upstairs bathroom, it has to fit the space there, it will have to work with the old chimney for plumbing chute, and it has to work with the ceiling/roof angles. I have bath #2 on paper now, have not checked measurements to see how they work but will before I go to my Dr appointment.
I can handle a lower ceiling/slanted ceiling in the bathroom if I plan it out right. I want things a certain way but if it does not work, then I will change it and like the change.. It's planned to be 5 foot wide, and that should not need changed, but I might have to change what order things are, right now it's toilet, sink and shower across the west end..like that but not sure I have the height for the shower.. can move entire bath east and get it to work...got plenty of space to work with up there, but it's how much space am I willing to give to a bathroom and just where I am willing to have that space taken out.
well it's almost 9 am so I need to get busy or I won't be showered and at that appointment on time, it's at the clinic south of the library so at least it's not a far drive, can run the bike..like that idea...

Phone call, the contractor will have some guys here tomorrow to get started- - his rep is very good, his work is very good, I really don't want to have someone else do this work but Need it started and done...

construction delays and pain

sure have me dealing with depression now. I don't think it will last, and I do think the contractor will show up, know that there are delays and he's small, not a lot of crew. The heat issues are a huge problem for construction work, and we are not dropping much below 80 at nights right now so it's early when it's hard to work on roofs and such.
My foot is being miserable, as are my hands, and and knees and back, so my pain levels are high, and I am spending time on my bed resting instead of out in the garden or up in the attic with the wiring project. And I am working late right now, Barb is on vacation so I am staying to finish up.
I will get through this, the house will get a new roof, the dormer built and the spiral stair is now is shipping so it will be here before the dormer is built.
Finances are ok, I need to balance the checkbook, and I need to put some $$ on my lunch card at work but that means a trip somewhere, Save-A-Lot, Wal-Mart, but sure am not getting it done.
I am getting the laundry taken care of, and I will turn the water on when I get home tonight so that will help the garden out. And I will try and do better, and I will plan to go to Springfield Friday as need to get x-rays sent or on disk for my doctor appointemnt..
I will be ok, just takes time, and I hope to see work done soon.

Construction delays still

But the work on central air starts early Tuesday/tomorrow morning, and I hope the work on the roof and dormer start soon too. I have the dormer window in the living room, the pipe to make the soil stack outside, have started taking things off the shelves, my dolls and other stuff I collect, moved some stuff in the attic where the new dormer goes, moved the antique chest of drawers that was living between the kitchen door and the bathroom wall, where the dormer will be going, so now my house gets to become a worse and worse mess. No place to put things, no place to store things and no room here.
It will get worse before it gets better so the sooner it is started, the sooner I can start putting the house back in order, clean up all the dirt and dust that gets knocked loose, and start work up in the studio, wiring, insulation, subfloor, and the spiral stairs will be here in just a couple weeks.
I need to balance the bank account again, need to pay a few bills again, need to run some errands tomorrow or Wed. and I need to mow again.
I am making progress on the garden weeds, I am almost done with reweaving the cane back in my rocker, have cane ordered and it should be in shipping now, this time I ordered a full bundle so will finish up this chair and store the rest.
It's ok to be back at work, my vacation was frustrating at times because I expected to see work being done here, be doing some of that clean up, go back to work with a good start on the attic studio, the central air done and be planning out the future upstairs bathroom.
My life here is pretty good, I won't say it's perfect, there's a few rough spots, some things that go hard that I don't often mention or write about..but I keep finding a way to see the light at the end of the tunnel, or find a blessing amongst the rocks and thorns.
This house might not ever be finished, this place might always be a renovation in progress but it's my renovation, and my little corner of the world and it works for me. I make a point of making it work, and I put in the sweat equity and the dollars that it takes to make it work.
Morning will start early, know the dog will have my up early and the air cond guys will be here early too, by 7:30 or so if the message on the answering machine is right..oh, great, Julie gets the window units and I get windows I can see out of and a quieter house!!! Ya, I like that idea...

construction delays here

Well, the air was to be done this week,now I expect them tomorrow, the contractor for roof and dormer was hoping to start here Monday, the 11th but first rain and now our heat wave has slowed him a week and he might be here Friday but the 18th is more likely.
I am on vacation this week, the rubbish bin is here now, I pouted yesterday after talking to my contractor and then curled up on Larry's couch and took a nap. It didn't change any thing much but I will do what I can this week, I can work on the wiring that needs done on both the north and south end walls, I can insulate those walls or at least get started on that. I can pull out some of the insulation that has gotten wet with the leaking roof problems and dispose of that. I can work to move some of my stuff stored up in that attic so it's more out of the way for the crew.
I can still work on the weeds in the garden, I will still have the mowing and watering to do and I still have Darrell's doctor appointment Thursday morning in Springfield as he is not to drive himself until after that appointment.
So, today Larry and did his blood work in Rushville, took cucumbers and beans to his sister, went to breakfast with her and husband, went to check out camp grounds in the area, went to Dot Foods, late lunch and came home and so from 8 am until after 3 p.m.I had Larry entertaining me.
Now I have picked the squash, sprayed the plum trees for the Japanese beetles and the squash for the squash bugs, looked at the tomatoes and paid my bike insurance bill.
I need to make a Wal-Mart run and also buy stamps so will do the stamps tomorrow as I have a letter with medical bills to send to State Farm, these should have been paid last month with the settlement and I bet they were but the accounts are not up to date. They were on the list of what was being paid out when we did the settlement paperwork.
I can buy some of what I need for the electrical work in the attic at Wal-Mart and get started with it instead of waiting until I go to Springfield, that will help me feel i am not totally wasting my vacation time.
I'm making knitting progress on Jake's socks but not on my purple sweater. I have to do the repairs on the old crochet bedspread I am sending to my aunt, she will enjoy it far more than I will and it was a great auction find.
I can also work on the caning replacement for the back of the rocker that was last summer's auction treasure. I have a lot of the materials needed so can start and order what I need, work until I run out and finish up after the materials come.
So, I don't need to pout or be screaming bored with my vacation. I might not be getting my new roof but I will be getting stuff done here that does need done.
Larry knows and laughs about the word 'relax' being my least favorite work in the English language.
Now it's not yet 5 p.m. and getting dark, so we might get some rain, it's needed and would help break the heat wave. My house is staying comfortable with what my kitchen window unit puts out but Larry's trailer gets miserable by afternoon and it's late at night before it really starts to cool off. Heart conditions do not tolerate real cold or hot and humid very well.

3 Day weekend and it's hot and dry so far. ..

Larry and I went to a family reunion picnic yesterday, his mother's side and out rural in a tiny town that's slowly shrinking away. I did start the day with watering the garden and picking the green beans.
Today I tried on the way too large bike cover, I can alter it and for $20 including shipping I can make it fit, the cost was less than buying the fabric and making 1 from scratch. It's now marked and on my bed, I might get that done today, I can't be outside long working on the weeds as the heat index is already high and it's not 10 am yet.
I finally finished the pair of blue socks I have been working on for months, they are mine and not a priority. I am making very slow progress on the purple sweater, I have it done to the sleeves and they knit down from the shoulder. I think they are about 1/2 of the length they need to be so they have grown some but at 8-10 rows an inch I can knit a long time and not see any amount of progress on the sleeves. It will be done before it's cold enough to wear it.
Larry is working on my little blue bike again, he's not sure what the problem is but I think part is for his own entertainment, good thing I have the red bike to ride..
He will resolve it's problems, if needed I will order parts for it and he will get it back together and running.
So, next week the house gets air and I get price quotes for air/heat in the attic, the week after that I am on vacation while the work on the roof gets started.
It will allow the crew to work later as I won't have to leave for work and I will be on hand if needed and to help with daily clean up, and I will hopefully get some work done outside that has been put off too long. All the flowerbeds here need work so it's not just the garden that has a weed and grass problem I need to deal with.
But I am doing far better than I was this time last year. I am back at work, I have gained a lot more walking ability and I AM NOT INVOLVED WITH a very dishonest man who has huge financial problems, I am still getting calls from collection agencies looking for him. I also get them for my oldest son, the people who used to own this house and who ever had my cell phone ## before I got it, normal problem with pre-paid cell phones but part of the small annoyances in life.
But I hope that man in Utah gets his creditors to leave me alone, it's hard for me to have a good opinion or him with stuff like this happening several times a month.
Well, I need to head back out and deal with some more of those garden weeds as I have a lot out there I want done in the next few days

Almost July

and we are having sunshine and temps up in the mid 80's so it actually feels like summer now.
A 3 day weekend, we have a family picnic Saturday and I hope to work on the weeds in the garden and on my blue bike. I still need to resolve it's fuel problem, think moisture in the fuel or dirty gas.
Work is going ok, have a week of vacation coming when we start work on the house in mid-July. I am looking forward to not having window air unit running and making noise. A quieter house, more comfortable and in time lower utility bills will sure be great improvement, along with that replaced roof so I don't deal with leaking roofs and all that brings.
I will pay some bills on line in the morning and also call and make arrangements for the roof disposal, want to know we will have the dumpster/roll off here when the work starts or before.
I drooled over wood floors on line today before work and priced sub-floor, will have that sub floor but not sure I will ever be able to afford the wood floor I would like but sure saw some nice flooring.
1 of the women in our dept got the maint. planner/kitting job so that put her job up to bid, I hope to get it and be permanent instead of temp so bid for the opening.
i am watching finances tightly so that my settlement goes as far as possible on this old house and the work I need or want done but get tempted by techie stuff and dolls, good thing I am too busy to go to Best Buys and play right now. .. .

Shopping for stairs

I have been shopping for stairs, spiral stair kits to be exact, as that is what will be installed for access to my attic. And I did not know there were so many out there, but have several price quotes and will get the stair kit ordered. It might not be here when the job starts but it will show up and get installed.
Both my air cond. guy and my roof/dormer guy were here today, and I have busy July coming up, and will take a week of vacation time when the roof/dormer contractor is here.
I have to arrange the refuse bin we will need,and I have to figure out where to put everything I have sitting on shelves now while the work is being done.
Once the air is done I get rid of the window units and loose that noise, once the roof is done I will get to enjoy a dry house and know it won't be long before the dehumidifier quits running all the time and I will start hearing the noises from the train instead of all the noise from things running in the house.
there is going to be a lot of work going on here for the summer, and possibly this fall and winter.
And in the meantime I have to change oil in my little bike, and work in the garden. We have a picnic thing Sunday with Larry's family, but I do not have this coming or next weekend planned out and will have time to catch up on a few things needing done around here, like weed the garden...

great Weekend

I will get photos posted but not this minute...Larry and I had a great weekend, didn't let the rain bother us, stayed until Monday morning, had sun all Sunday afternoon and evening so ran around on our bikes, walked a bit, Larry visited with 1 of the camp hosts, someone he has known for many years, I went riding while the guys chatted and caught up.
Today was busy, business in Springfield, and did find the locksmith there could and did make me spare up keys for my little bikes, and for $2 per key which sure beats paying $9 for a blank, plus postage and then paying to have the key cut. That was the on line seller I found who would have gladly sold me the same key blanks the local locksmith had. I did try the ones for the blue bike and they work just fine..
And I signed the contract with Brannon's for the central air, that will be done within 3 weeks, probably within 2, depends on when the parts all come in, someone will be here Thursday to let me know more and also look at what I want for the attic studio, and then work up some options and prices for me.
I got 2 deck materials costs, 1 for pressure treated, 1 for composite, think deck will be support and frame/joices and then deck it a few boards at a time as paycheck allow...composite is just over double the cost of pressure treated, so that would help me work the higher cost and better/lower maint material into the project...
Busy day tomorrow, and plans for the weekend, several auctions in Virginia I want to check out and might go to Springfield with Julie and do some things there, Larry thinks a 'girl' day would be good for me, or more like he does not want to be drug around all day while I play...LOL, he's smart enough to know I will be going like a 5year old on an all day sugar high.

Where's that list we made last camping trip??

We did make a list, in the netbook, of what we need and didn't have, what needs done, and so forth, now I need to print it out or copy it and edit/print so we can work on getting more organized this trip..
The awning is on, we did get 2 sizes of trash bags,aluminum foil, hangers and a new set of on clearance sale sheets, these are for Larry's bed at his house, some what will fit his taller mattress and won't be crawling off in the night, hate that.
And the phone calls today were a car salesman, Larry, insurance guy and a bill collector looking for Michael Ferrin. The machine got the car salesman's call, he can't call early enough to catch me before work, Larry wanted to let me know he had the awning on and was back home, insurance guy and I have an appointment next week.
I don't enjoy calls from collection agencies looking for someone who does not live here..that includes my oldest son, a man I used to date, people who I bought this house from 6+ years ago. . . some I can get stopped, the computer ones are annoying as I can't do much about them and the bad attitude humans get me hostile fast.
But Larry and I have reservations to go camping, a house/dog/bird sitter arranged, the mowing is done, the laundry is washed and dry, the weather will be ok, we will have the dvd player and a stack of movies, I will raid my collection ..and take my Kindle, my knitting, and probably not the bikes but will call a friend about borrowing his ramps, the same ones that I sold him as I didn't own a bike any longer. . .
Work is going ok, I get a bit faster at sorting equipment racks each week, foot hates me some nights but that will be the normal for the rest of my life. I am making a living, paying my bills, supporting myself and my old house,my pets and hobbies.
I'm dating a great guy who isn't trying to change me, isn't trying to use me, isn't lying to me about some huge debts. And we do stuff together that we both enjoy and want to do, like last week's trip up north, and the camping trips, and scooting about town on our little bikes.
The house will get it's new roof, and probably central air. I might get started on that deck in the back, that would be nice and I might get some other stuff done, new sidewalk along the south side of the house would be nice, new porch would be great...
I might break down and buy a few nice summer tops that I can wear instead of t-shirts, now that would be a change.
It's time for a quick snack and off to bed, know I will be up early and have a long and busy day....

A Great Weekend

I took Friday off as a single vacation day and Larry and I headed up to Rockton IL to see and bring home another 1981 Honda Passport, red and in almost showroom condition.
The trip up was the I and make fast time, as the seller had plans that meant picking up the bike before 4:30 or on Saturday. We made it in good time but had to call to get directions to the house, his e-mailed directions were terrible but his wife was a great 'over the phone' map. LOL, but we did buy the bike and loaded it in my little truck, under the camper shell. It was a tight fit and I am glad Larry did not have my camera in hand when I was worming to the front of the truck bed to strap down that little bike.
Then it was down to Rockport and find a motel, then off to Red Lobster to eat very well, we were stuffed and back to the motel. We actually went to Rock Cut State Park on the way down, thought it was very pretty, enjoyed the ducks feeding their young on the spillway there.
We came home by smaller roads, followed Rock Cut River some, and just played tourist, I drove and Larry had great map book and was a terrific navigator. I think we both had a really great escape.
I even got home in time to pick the green beans again, we picked up strawberries on the way back so ended up with fresh green beans and ham for supper with strawberry shortcake for dessert.
Sunday I went to Springfield and went down to Edwardsville with others in our doll club for our Annual June meeting at Laurie's shop. This was the first time I was able to go so had NO idea what a fab shop she and her father have there.
The little bike did get out of my truck Monday and is Larry's garage, it's raining now so I am not getting the neglected mowing done, Larry is working on the red truck again, some hose blew Sunday, he's off to pick up the replacement that had to be ordered, I have house chores so will be working on them instead of off playing with him.
We do have the new awning in and Larry's got a Thursday early appt. to get it installed and we have camping reservations again so plan to run out Friday and set up camp, hopefully more sheltered than the first trip and hopefully better set up and organized than the first trip.

Reservations Made!

And we are going camping again, same state park, different camp site, with afternoon shade and hopefully not as much wind exposure if a storm comes up. And the bikes are going with us, or so the current plans are.
My little bike goes to work with me now, it's a short ride, only 2.5 miles or so, I would not have much chance to ride it otherwise. And lots of people think it's cute. I can like that, I am female and we like 'cute'.
Today we had the first green beans from the garden, I have them weeded and hilled up and hope they do better than prior years, I have not hilled them up for support in the past.
The corn is short and starting to push up tassel stalks, way too short so I do not expect very many ears or good corn this year, the weather just was NOT good this spring for corn.
I don't feel the garden is growing 'right' this year, our late and cold spring and then turning so hot has not been good for the garden, some of my flowers are blooming early too, and I need to dead head some already.
The plant/company has done some computer updating again, and many of us are now password locked out again. I will call tomorrow, go in early so I can go into HRD and get the problem resolved for me, wanted to check the coming paycheck and see if the missing 2 days and overtime had been 'found'.
Have someone coming about Air cond tomorrow, 3rd bid but I don't consider the place in town to be worth considering. . . if I want skinned and taken for a fool I can buy a few lottery tickets.

busy week here

and I need to get with it, eat breakfast, make a phone call or 2, get with the weeds and grass in the garden.
Have someone coming to look at the air cond job so they can give me a bid, have laundry to put away and need to wash a load of jeans, floors are a mess, sand and wet sandy dog, something about all the rain, but we track in a lot of sand any way, it beats clay in my opinion.
Not sure if Larry will go with me to get the newest bike for our collection, it's a long and hard drive for him, hips and knee gets to hurting bad and it will fit in my little truck, I measured my bike, it's same size. And I hope to have Friday off and go up then, if Larry goes, I will spring for a hotel for the night and come back Saturday.
Now I am wanting a small trailer to haul little bikes on, my truck now has air and would easily pull small trailer with the bikes when we go camping.
the garden is growing fast, I need to give away the leaf lettuce that needs picked and thin the radishes, have peas that will soon need picked and the green beans are making tiny beans so I will soon be giving away loads of beans. The corn is getting taller and Kid only killed a few stalks, the potatoes are flowering, my first potatoes here. The squash and cucumber plants are growing slowly, but looking good, I need to get out there and get busy with the hoe where I can use it and then the seat and hand tools in the beans and such where I can't use the hoe as well.
It is a better summer than last year's was, I am so much stronger, doing more than my orthopedic team ever expected me to be able to do, more than I expected me to do.
Having found a small enough motorcycle I can ride is wonderful, I like the bigger tires than a scooter has, easier on our rough roads and they are vintage cute bikes, I like that part too.
I have made a lot of progress emotionally in the past few months with this recovery, and with getting my life back to a stable and content place. It will never be the same as before the accident but I've come back a long, long way.
Well, time to get busy with the day.

the much awaited camping trip

Well, we were a bit disorganized but did manage to leave town and get to the camp ground and Larry was starting to set up when I headed back to town and Work on Friday.
I found my way back to camp with no problems just after midnight and Saturday was blue skies, hot and doing great. Until late afternoon when I took the netbook and headed on foot to the host to use the free wifi and book reservations for the weekend after next. It being Father's Day and the place packed...and the storm came in, I did not have the BRAINS to head back to the camper, winds tore the awning off . . and our great weekend away went flat/sour fast. Larry has everything insured, we will recover from it, my netbook will dry out and be fine but for a 'shakedown' camping trip, we sure managed to shake a lot of things we didn't plan to.
There sure are some advantages to tent camping, but Larry has to have air cond. with his heart condition. And I admit that 'portable house' of his sure is great 'digs' and I know he will calm down, get over the mad, he's already called the insurance, he is already arranging to get the awning roller thing home, and ya, he will go camping again, next trip we will do better, I understand what goes where, what needs done and we will be better set up, have stocked better, take the little bikes...
But I am glad to be here in my house with the birds and dog while he unwinds with his recliner and tv and without my chatter...

It'sNot for Sale..

Well, I got my first offer to sell the bike--No, it's not for sale, NO I will not set a price, and I rode it to work today. It sure looked little there with all the much bigger bikes in our bike parking area. The ride home was nice, but I am wanting a windscreen/bug shield for it. And a good fitting helmet or brain bucket for my head..
3rd week on the new job, 2 out so we are all working a bit of overtime to get everything done that has to be done before we all can leave for the night. I won't complain about the extra $ as I have plenty of bills to eat it up.
We did have a good weekend even with all the rain. I got some weeding done, the mowing done, it needs done again so maybe tomorrow I will get it done before work. Had some bike time, some quality Larry time, and rested up some.
Now I have to get organized, get things done, get calls made to more contractors and get bids on the work here needing done. If I don't hear from State Farm by the end of the week I will make a note to me about calling Monday.
in the meantime, I have things to get done, weeds to pull, a very small motorcycle to get used to riding...